My life is slowly going down the drain W is with J and she's very annoying trust me. Im going to start a catfight with her any day now and Im still single and lonely. I only have a couple of good guy candidates but I still want more options things are getting trickier by the second. So today I just gave up and Became myself. I went outside and cleaned my skateboard's wheels and tightened them. I fixed my bike the chain, wheels, and seat. My hands are all covered in dirt and oil for the wheels. Trust me Im pretty good with a wrench and a oil. Ive been fixing my bike since I was 8. W was there with J but I didn't care. She was bieng a snob and he was looking worried while I was at peace and control. I had on my basketball pants which look just like are PE shorts just black and no logo. And my green tanktop. Yes W was suprised that I wore that but no I didn't want to dress up for him anymore. J was like Oh you want to fix my bike when I come here with Wolfie I swear she's a dumb headed Blonde and it's not even her real hair color I would know her roots are not done properly. Her nails are long but wrongly filed and she looks great in short skimpy outfits. She;s skinny and pretty. She is perfect for W he's way out of my league. I'm just Giving up yes I am throwing in the towel and not good enough for him. Or pretty enough I shouldn't even try. (tear roll down cheek) yes even though I promised I would never cry for a guy EVER Im doing it now. Im going to wallow in my pain and agony and I literally don't care anymore. All my slutty clothes are going in the trash I'm going to go back into my casual self. W is to good for me, no correction he's to perfect for me. He's understanding and kind. And all Ive been is a b***h. So Im through no more trying to be good for him IM GIVING UP. And Im quiting the club the guys will understand and Im going to cry in a corner right now(sniff) and maybe lose a couple of pounds and maybe try to be more like a girl. No more guy stuff like football, skateboarding, and playing video games. So maybe when I do see W I won't feel that bad that Im not good enough for him. But I still wont, correction I will never be good enough for him. AS hard as I try! (sniff, sigh, cry, cry harder, cry even harder, cry until my I can cry no more) crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying crying
tenn-a-shoe · Sun Dec 07, 2008 @ 09:14pm · 0 Comments |