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I just dunno what to do anymore. I miss that b*****d too much. I know he's no good for me, I know he only likes to make me suffer, but it's just so hard to not think about him. Everything reminds me of him... Gaia, books, friends, even Steven. You know... he's the reason why I can't write anymore. We were working on a book together before all this happened. I haven't been able to write anything worth reading since. That book we were writing... it was probably the one I was the most excited about. I can't write it now. I've tried... and I just can't. I can't write someone I was initially writing with someone else on my own. I don't like writing anymore. It's all a piece of s**t. That's why I don't Rp anymore. We met at an Rp. Goddess forgive me for all the things I've done in the past. I'm only half human, I make mistakes. However, you are a mother, and you do not like your children suffering. So here I am, your humble servant, begging you to heal this wretched heart and soul. Let me be at peace with myself and my decisions so I may continue living. I really cannot deal with this anymore, and I'm terrified of that breaking point. Anything could happen, including that which I do not wish to do...