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Insecure and feeling alone, the thoughts of love in my head rome. Go ahead and say; Im too young and he has traps, he has only one thing in mind. But Im too distracted by his eyes. Im blind. I forget everything even the time because time goes by quik when he is allI can think about. And ever since him,I havent felt dispair or doubt.
We hung out, talked, looked down quite enough. So I guess this is what its like to have pupy dog love. He laughs and I laugh, its contagious. I swear he was sent from above. He hugs me tight and never lets go. And I thought in my mind "Oh, how I love him so."
He played with my scarf and looked in my eyes, and then a sudden suprise... He kissed me and my heart melted feeling loved and warm, I have never felt like this,only depressed and torn.
We seperated and I was breathless and wanting more. So we kept kissing eachother passionotely, and I couldnt feel earths gravity. I was lost in a dream and it couldnt be real. A girl like me doesnt get a guy like him. Tottaly unreal. He had to go and we kissed and said goodbye. I thought I was invincible like I could fly, untill what happened one night.
A couple months later "our" love for eahcother was still burning but I got news from a friend saying;"He has a new fling, a girlfriend." I swallowed hard and held my tears back, I felt like I was a shattered mirror. Broken and ready to crack. I said I will talk to you soon, I layed on bed crying and screaming at the moon.
I listened to The Song Sorrow's heart breaking words;"And we kissed eachother one more time and sang this lie that's half way mine. The sword is flexing through the question so I won't be fooled by his Angel light..." And it was tragic and back to depression forever. I thought he said I'll never leave you, baby girl you're a treasure...
I started questioning things, like my sexualality. And I became bi sexual because I was a rebel, when they said my name i never hesitated or trembled, again. I was messed up in the world because of a boy. He played with my heart like a toy. I guess the message here is never rely on a guy to keep your heart, he will only tear it apart. Until Mr. Charming comes, you will be torn apart and be treated like scum. Don't rely on a guy to make you feel nice, dont just look at him, but think twice, about who he is and what he does, because he might just break your heart and throw away your love...
I am better now, I rely on God to make me great, but even if you dont blieve in God, dont trust a boy because after that you will only feel regret, despair, and full of hate......