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I was once told that there was a point where you had to be honest with yourself to really find yourself.

This is where I do it, I guess.

Today.. I broke it off with my girlfriend. Yesterday was her birthday.. Yeah, I feel like s**t, and.. Part of me even regrets breaking up with her. And then there's this other girl I've liked for about two years. Her nickname is Syn. Tis what I call her. Now.. She'd had a girlfriend the whole time, so things never went anywhere, of course. And then there's my ex, Katt. I love my ex girlfriend. I mean, she knows me front and back, but.. I've told her dozens of times that I don't want to date her. I'd like to test the waters elsewhere. I want to try to be with someone else. I'm not ready to be with her and break up all over again.

My predicament?

-sighs- I regret breaking up with my girlfriend a bit. I mean, I really liked her. But.. Conversations about my inability to keep up a relationship.. About how internet relationships were bad.. Well, I fell apart on the idea. Not to mention the fact that my sister was telling me Summer was saying s**t about me that she never really was.

As for Syn.. She finally broke up with her girlfriend and now we're.. I don't really know. I think there's some kind of thing between us, but there was never any real words. I don't know. I mean, not knowing where I stand kinda sucks. but.. I'm kinda sore about the idea of dating her, even though I care so much about her, because I just broke up with Summer, whom I cared about a lot.

Do I feel better? Not really. I mean, I guess.

I hope things work themselves out. I don't want Summer to be upset with me, or hurt for what I said. I don't really want to date my ex right now because it's unhealthy and.. I don't know anything about my princess right now. >> She's a dork, I know that much.

..I always thought I could pull off dating, but.. Maybe I was made to be single..?