Dear Texas,
Did I mention how much I hate you?
This would be my very first 4th of July without seeing even one freakin' firework.
This saddens me... and quite frankly, makes me want to leave you sooner.
Don't pretend like our relationship was ever anything amazing.
Compared to California, you're boring.
You even make me miss seeing the homeless drug addicts wandering the streets of my hometown. Ah... that takes me back. They all had somethin' to say... even that mute guy John-Bob had a crazy story to relate. Something about a stripper in a Chuck-E-Cheese... or so I gathered.
Texas, your homeless people are just homeless. Like Ben Stein clones with whiskey on their breath. Not exciting in the least.
I'm leaving you on the 18th. Unfortunately I have to come back on August 1st, but that should give you enough time to think about your issues and correct them.
I expect fireworks to be legal when I get back. Also, get some drugs on your homeless people. Teach your drivers how to drive as if they weren't retarded and put a beach near my apartment.
Please and thank you.
- Alli
PS: As an apology gift, I'd also like you to send me a basket full of chocolate.
 Alli~Monae II · Tue Jul 05, 2011 @ 07:39am · 0 Comments |
