Okai, so I have my JayJay already right? So why do I always feel he's not the right guy for me then? I should be thinking about HIM more than anything in life! But I'm not..here I am thinking about some other guy more than him! I don't want to break up with him yet, since I'm not really sure if I really like him or not, I mean what if I do break up and then realize that I was wrong and I really DO like him? Besides, I want for us to go back to being the best friends we always used to be even if we break up. But I'm afraid that won't happen. I mean what am I going to say, "Jay, I don't love you anymore I think about some other guy more than you and I don't know what to do"? That'd just kill the freakin hell outta him and I don't want to do that. I mean at times I feel like he's exactly what I want..but then at other times, I feel as if I'm caught between two guys, do I really like Jay? or is it that I'm just forcing myself to like him because the other guy I always wonder about is popping inside my head 24/7 ? I mean I know I shouldnt be thinking even TWICE about this, but still, I mean I am.. I really should be head over heals for my boyfriend, but the truth is, I'm not. The one I always dream, think, and even try to daydream about is someone else..What am I going to do? I mean I know if I do break up with Jay, I still don't have a chance with that other someone. But if I don't break up with him, our relationship is going to go nowhere...I'm so confused on what I should do, I go up on the roof every night to think about it too. Just me up there staring up at the night sky without any disturbance..(unless my younger brother is awake and always trying to get up the roof with me and yelling until he gives up...>.> wink I even get headaches and stomach aches when I think this over.. So am I wrong? Should I just love this guy that's known as my boyfriend..or should I just give it all up..
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Mine! Not your's, kai? Okai :]
Dun look!!! gosh, okai, you can look, but just a peek, mmkay??
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[.popkins.]
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![[.popkins.]](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/5a/f2/56b7fd164ff25a.png?t=1193934189_6.00_00 "[.popkins.]")
hehe. Mai eyes look vury chinky...Dx
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[.popkins.]
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Hmmm....
who's teh other guy/someone???
o.O