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Yesterday was a hell of a day for me, think of it as D-day only i'm not full blooded german. Before i go into yesterday they let me fill whoever actually reads this in on my situation. In a few months i will most likely be homeless, my relationship with my dad is exsactly where i like it to be, none exsistant. He was abusive to me and my mom for as long as i can remeber. He was in prison when i was born and stayed there until i was around five. He got put away and then got two strikes all for aggrevated assault against my mom. He got out and was an alchoholic for the first five years he lived with us, he never did anything realy bad most likely out of fear for a third strike. He would yell scream slap me around a little and pass out. After he stopped drinking was when the real trouble started, he couldn't touch anyone anymore so he decided to degrade them as much as possible so i spent the next ten years learning how much of a worthless piece of fatherless ungrateful weak s**t i was. Finally my mom got up the courage to take my brother sister and me and leave, this was about six months ago. He then spent the next five months threating to kill me my mom and anyone else near us. The worst part, my mom couldn't afford to support all of us and keep our new appartment, and i couldn't find work. So since last month we've moved back in with my dad, i say almost nothing to him. He told my mom he would change, and i've yet to see that happen. Through all of this one person was always there for me even through the bullshit, my girlfriend. As of yesterday though she told me she wants to take a break, and being the idiot i am, i hung up on her. Now she won't even take my phone calls or give me a reason as to why she wants a break.
Now i have no family.
The one person i trusted left me.
The people who i thought were my friends couldn't care less.
And i have nothing to my name, not even a job to save up from.
What and who i have left is minimal, and i can feel even that slipping out of my hands.
And i don't even know why after all this time i'm deciding to put this in my journal. I don't even think anyone will read this.