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Wheel of Morality, Turn Turn Turn... aka, Pt. 2 |
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Everything from part 1? Lack of communication in every aspect. Lack of communication from men to women, lack of communication from society to its constituents, cryptic comments from a secondary source: your best friend, your cousin, your coworker, your classmate, your brother in arms, etc..... the idea that subtlety can somehow not only prevent anyone from getting pissed at you, but additionally dangerously making the assumption that the person you're speaking will absolutely pick up on it and realize where you're heading.
^By the way, that very last line is, the way I see it, the ultimate ********]. Not only that, but failure to recognize that you do it practically EVERYDAY combined with failure to realize it's been done to you, is exactly how politicians, law enforcement, salesmen, criminals, lawyers, doctors (and anyone else who's either sold their soul for extended tuition debts or graduated c** laud from The School of Hard Knocks) spin you, their customer, consumer, average joe, patient, client, delegate, potential voter... into all sorts of decisions that might not ******** your life over, but carry that lethality nonetheless.
You're very apt to fall for it, even if you put yourself on vigilant guard against it, and the hilarity ensues once you figure out one of the easiest ways to discover you're being lured and persuaded into a mindset you weren't aware you wanted... is to just step back, out of the crowd, out of the intimacy zone of others, shut up, and THINK. Take all the time you want, just sit back and THINK.
I've got problems with that as I'm typing it. It's a constant struggle, because it's too easy to just fall into it, let people make your choices for you, and go with the flow. It's wonderful... until, like all good things, it comes to an end, and you face "the morning after" head-on. See, you're waking, or coming into a new day, still trying to process the events that occurred, because you weren't really taking it all in at that point: you were sitting back, zoning out your brain, shutting down, relying on someone you just met, or may not know. A complete stranger even, and you gave them the keys to your car. You're waking up, finding your tank was full the night before and now it's at E with a dented front end and broken airbags...
Meanwhile, life greets you!
"Good morning sleepyhead? Have a good night? I DON'T GIVE A ********! Haha, b***h, look what you're in for now!" Existence will speak to you with a grin and a nice suit as it's smacking you upside the head with a 2 by 4.
Then it sinks in, as you recall, or not, when exactly it was that you just stopped holding your own: you found what your limit is, yes sir you did, and then you jumped off into the deep end not quite sure if you could tread water, but blindly listening to the snake oil and shiny bling that was nothing more than plastic with "gold" cover.
You put your trust in someone without thinking about it at all. But THAT is ok. If you approached every stranger like they had a knife in their hand and rope in the back seat, you would breakdown from the stress. That's because, like I previously stated, we're social creatures, and social creatures have a need to be social. You deny yourself that, and you will start to feel it. Trust is crucial.
We do it because it works, and most people are nice, caring people who, despite just meeting you, still have a minute amount of concern for your well-being. Most people at a party aren't going to approach you rape spider-style, and most people at a party will grab you a beer, or offer chips, or put a blanket over your passed out a**. You put forth in return, keep it mutual, and provided common grounds are found, make friends and contacts and expand your knowledge by tapping into the mindset of your fellow sapiens.
And then there's the one, every once in a while, who is luring you in. They're no different than you, other than... while most people will refrain from using an establishment of trust to reel you in... whatever it may be... due to the idea that you can find throughout the world of "treating others as you would life to be treated," con artists, scammers, dirty salesmen...
(I make this point because there are good salesmen, believe it or not, who would prefer if you bought their product, but understand that you have the final option, and will attempt to be as honest and forthright as they can about the pros and cons of their product. We're a consumer society, so sales is a large branch for us, and there are a lot of people who make an honest living from it. Don't think I'm out to ******** you over at work, as I'm sincerely paranoid it'd lower my standing to coworkers and mangers.)
... and other charlatans who've achieved a higher level of proficiency in interpersonal communication: spin doctors, as it were, usually think they're better than you, and you're nothing more than a sheep waiting to be lead to their flock of agreement. All they have to do, in their head, is push you in the right directions, at the right times, and make sure that the "wolves" -- independent parties not being put under their "spell" who could butt in and breaking that trance -- don't run after you.
If you fall for it, you're reaffirming THEIR mode of thinking, rewarding their methods, and motivating them to continue it.
Persuasion is not a bad thing. It's nice to use "Please, can you get me something from the store?" with a little suggestion here and there, should your subject at hand not be so forthright about wanting to go, if you're actually feeling like s**t. It's an occasional thing and occasional use isn't bad.
It's when you have people who will sit their minions down and present them with an orientation covering the method of spin. It's when you've got companies and campaigns and secretaries and officials and panhandlers who are using this same basic idea of persuasion and turning it into a certified method. It's actually there, and I've done a shitload of it, and it works: you ask the right questions to a person in the right way, and work it like a flow chart, and if you're good at it and persistent you will achieve a high percentage of agreement and generally end with your desired result.
There are books about this s**t, big books filled with hundreds of pages of text just going all over the subtle art of manipulation, exploitation, and plain ole jive. Right down the street, you've probably got a bookstore, so go look and banish your optimistic doubts.
It's there because it works. It's there because people think journalists are purely objective, which is usually the case, however they fail to understand that all it takes is me changing a few words to make you feel different about something, when it's the same damn thing.
"Traffic accident claims two lives" is the same thing as "Two dead bodies reported as result of head-on collision" yet it's been proven that the first headline would generally make people feel mildly sad but generally nonplussed, while the latter shows to bring about a more emotional response: it sounds much more brutal. You can see the image in your head, even, when compared to the first. Even if you read the whole deal, it's just all to easy to look at "traffic accident" and think about that one fender bender you had... no biggie, compared to HEAD ON COLLISION.
Then people go, "HOLY s**t?!?!" They're more likely to read the article presented using the second headline. It's been shown people like to see bad things on the news in this age more than they did in previous decades, even though you'd sit down and think about it, you'd come to a conclusion that this is just promoting the idea that our cities or towns or community as a whole is full of more dangerous ******** up people and crime than it is.
It's pumped in your head. You don't have to watch TV, but when you do, it's journalism with a sinister and sneaky twist. You can write all the objective articles you want, all the objective reports you want: both sides can be presented equally and fairly in that report and there is absolutely no bias.... as a single report.
And then they'll take what they report ON and put together several... there's your bias. Today on the news wasn't "Good news today: gas prices down a little!" or "Hope for the economy coming up next" or "Our president's actually doing what he can to recover from a very complicated situation that requires a little more thought that his ethnicity" and so on.
It was accidents, deaths, kidnappings... stuff that, really, I mean, if you've got a phone and so does everyone you know, should be able to be left unreported and between the parties directly affected. You've got complete strangers coming by: "I saw what happened on the news and I'm so sorry!!"
Because it makes them feel good but at the same time gives them a smug sense for bragging rights and storytelling: "Omg guys, did you see that crazy shooting down over at blahblahalah? I know, scary, huh? Well I ran into the mother of that boy who was killed, and just, I was a little surprised...."
Meanwhile, if you're the mother of a son who was just shot down... well, in my position, I'd be barely able to hold myself together in public, and the last thing I'd really want to hear is a person who is trying to give me an apology because they saw me on the news today. The last thing I'd want is media attention, or strangers at my funeral later during the day. It'd be a very personal, private pain for me: the pain of losing someone who had no limit on the amount of love I could give towards him.
You as a news watcher have no right to participate in, attempt to water down, or console that pain, and you have no right to tell people to smile or cheer up because it makes YOU feel awkward. You really don't have to do s**t unless they want you to, and attempting to do s**t is very intrusive, even if you're unaware.
Fame, recognition, we're being raised on it. We wanna be the news story. What if your news story comes up, your face in front center: "house fire kills family, one sole survivor"
Haha, I guess the joke's on you, right? You can see why the Joker laughs at the uncaring and unshakeable idea of death, carnage, violence, suffering, and cold rotting silence for eternity.
You've fell for the spin, you've gotten looped in on something you shouldn't be privy to.
Now they'll throw in a few political issues, making you feel like you've got a grip on your country's state of affairs because you listened for 5 minutes daily: oh dear, whatever will happen to our American citizens?
They're not meant to be quite as captivating as the tragedies, because you can't get too hooked or you'd be doing your own research, forming your own opinions, and suddenly realize you don't need CNN, FOX, ABC, CBS, Dateline, 20/20, anyone telling you this stuff, because it's seriously RIGHT there, first page of results on Google, daily, updated with more immediacy than your news station.
Now you're feeling emotionally convicted, yet informed. You're probably going to forget every fact they put out for the politics... that poor poor car collision... oh dear (meanwhile attempting to repress or chastise yourself for secretly wishing you could have rubbernecked..) and then we'll turn to the most meaningless bullshit: entertainment.
Which is redundant, because the news is entertainment presented in a way that most people consider it entirely factual. I'm sure you've ran into SOMEONE who sounded like they'd simply repeated everything their favorite reporter crooned this morning.... XD
Well, celebrity bullshit! Welcome to somehow-more-special-than-where-you-live-land, where everything is AMAZING and filled with gold and that thing you love. You would be on a horse! Oh yes, all that negativity floating around, man, this place I live is dangerous and I don't have nearly enough money----
(protip: NO ONE ever has "nearly enough money" when they say it, whether it's a bum or millionaire. Unfortunately, while for some it may be genuine poverty, others are bitching about their income when what they really mean to say is that they got bored with the level they're at, and are ready to take another climb at the ladder of "peer pressure standards of success." You know, the people you interact with who used their tax refund to buy new jacuzzi, then b***h about their collected lump sum of debt? Yep.)
--- I won't admit it myself, but I'm never satisfied because I was raised to keep going til I die, keep trying to be better than I was and never resting or sitting back and thinking about whether I'm happy... oh, let's shove that away, feels funny. But YEA MAN, this place sucks and OMG Hollywood! L.A.! Miami! They have fancy cars, fancy houses, fancy servants and weird weird things.
And dude, celebrities, technically, are WEIRD. Becoming a celebrity is much like being a cop, in the sense that you're going to get a lot of "second chances," "get out of jail free" passes, and offers presented to you that the rest of society doesn't fully get to see, understand, or experience.
When's the last time you saw someone you grew up in Boise with go to jail for drunk driving and get out a month later "on probation"? Celebrity house arrest? Wow, their house is bigger than my whole damn block. Gee, what a small and confining place. I'll feel so trapped and bored. I guess I'll have to call all my awesome sauce friends up who would dump me the moment I had an average income to come over and some gigantic house party!!
And, um, you know, like, I guess we could do something cool like get our very own circus to come over and juggle while they striptease. I mean, like, isn't that what everyone does when they're partying?
But, um, like, Ethiopia? --This is where the agent steps in from the side.... you guessed it! Spin doctors, keeping your role models docile and placated. And they'll comply because they can keep getting perks. Conditioning at its finest, Pavlov would be crying tears of joy, followed by vomiting. Like the moment of despair Einstein had when the mushroom cloud rose: you can visualize something all you want, work towards it... but oh s**t, once you realized how bad it was, how much you softened it up for your own sake... horrifying.
--Oh um yea, Ethiopia! Um, like that's really bad. They're starving over there(yet I'm planning on tossing my cheeseburger up for dinner) and like we gotta do something about it. Now to talk to agent again....
WE ARE GONNA GO TO ETHIOPIA AND HELP OUT. I was handing out water bottles and like putting blankets on cold children and hugging them and s**t. I think they like me. ^Meanwhile: who the ******** is she? Do you have FOOD, b***h?
I feel like we really helped and I feel good. Sure you do, your agent's a magnificent b*****d. Oh, um, money? Well, um, actually, I don't really deal with that by myself (bwahaha, they'll have people like me filing things away and stacking their benjamins... who needs to be in front of a crowd when you have power by knowledge?) I just have like some people... um, I dunno who they are... well they do it. You'd have to talk to my agent, he's doing everything and I'm just your pretty PR face.
I don't diss actors' TALENT. Acting is a skill, dancing is a skill, convincing character buildup is a skill. However, I don't see preteens flocking to the latest ballet performance. Do you? Even funnier, is the sheer amount of acting talent you'd have to employ to be an agent!! Hahahaha.
Again, exceptions to the rules. So you see a celebrity arrested. WHO CARES? Do you care when everyone else in the entire country gets arrested? ******** no! You don't know them, you are not them, you're not bailing them out(technically... taxes), you have no correlation other than the one-sided view they're giving to you. And while yes, not all actors are dicks, and many will smile and thank you for your devotion...
It's just like the woman apologizing to the mother, but switched in a sense. That celebrity is thanking you because without everyone they wouldn't have the fame that they have, and to keep your attention. You think it's much more genuine than it is, because you are being played. Celebrities are spin doctors who outright SAY it's what they do, and then submit themselves to certain "don't ask, don't tell, don't think, don't get curious" aspects in order to maintain that beautiful luxury lifestyle.
Being a celebrity, and being famous, means you can't take a s**t without someone thinking it's some sort of DIVINE RIGHT to comment on it. Criticizing celebrities is for people too scared to criticize the policies that ******** us over and decide to b***h about their wasted movie ticket instead.
You have this, with the weather and traffic: the only informative things I've seen on news since Marvin Zindler died, and at the end of the news they cut straight to a show, leaving you virtually little time to back away and think it through with no distraction.
THIS. You're continuously bombarded and overwhelmed and rarely are you given time to think it through before it's off to the next crazy trend or consumer goodie or slap chop or zumba or google plus or latest chevy pickup. Throughout it you're made to feel like you've been given choices by them, when they only choice you have is the choice you give yourself.
And it's likely, because you've got bills to pay, or mouths to feed, or s**t to do, that you'll just accept it and obey. Thinking it through is difficult because you haven't practiced, and it's not like you have to change your name and move to the woods, guys. You just gotta look at that sexy sexy woman with the beer in her hand and go "that's shopped as ********, that beer will still taste like piss, and past experience has shown to me time and time again that women will not ride my d**k when I pick up that bottle."
Then go on with your life. Practice makes perfect, and perfection is impossible. Continuously practice, take a chill pill once and while and demand a break, as your own authority. And THINK. THINK THINK THINK. There's no such thing as thinking too much, and if you start thinking in circles, just look outward to find a new path to think on.
You'll talk faster, read faster, listen more clearly, pick up conversation when you trying to eavesdrop solely because people seriously believe they can talk about subjects at normal volume and no one will think anything of it: "I mean, BARBIE, SERIOUSLY, I mean, like, that gynecologist's hand was so damn cold! But I think he's kinda sexy. Guess he'd know his way around, huh?"
It's rather fun, actually. You think about things and realized how absurdly complex the world is, and then realize how complex it is because it needs to be, and how complexity can further complex on itself, and how intricate details form this beautiful whole and we're part of the whole and this is just another small part of something we might discover someday: a quest for exploration, knowledge, thirst for learning instead of power, a simple joy in the wonder of it all.
I'm seriously Atheist, with supernatural leanings that are shrinking more and more every day, and NEVER have I thought, "God made all this." But you know what? Life is beautiful, and it is horrible, and it is ever continuing, this constant force. It's something I cannot control, at all. And why would I?
What kind of superficial egotistical dumbass seriously thinks they've got the best way to fix the problems of 8 billion people, 99% of which they wouldn't even see in passing by from an airplane?
See, it answers itself. Humility is knowing you're not any more important that someone else. Self-preservation is knowing when you can give and when you need to keep it. True wisdom, or, at least the road to it, is going down life understanding that you'll never understand it all, but trying your damndest to anyway.
Next time someone praises you, take it with a smile. Just remember that that's one person who praised you, and that's doesn't mean every other ******** will do so, or even care. Accept that, take the good feeling from that and just be happy: you don't have to push it out, or brag. I've realized it's a lot funner and more fulfilling anyway, rather than doing things just so I can tell my friends and talk about how awesome I was, to actually do things and reminisce.
I've found it leads to weirdly embarrassing but cool things like having someone you know suddenly be your instant wingman and make you look like the coolest ******** to walk the planet. It's way cooler to know that my friends think I'm cool and I think they're cool and I didn't have to try and play myself up to do it like some douchebag. Yes Johnny Cage, I'm talking about you.
Is it just me or does everything I write come off as self-help-like? Honestly, I don't mean it that way, although you can only help yourself lmao.
Just, I like stating my piece, and I like reading when others do so, and I like learning, and although I've been warning the dangers of assumption, I'm constantly assuming that others will have the same drive that I have for learning, and life, and love, and people, and could just learn to figure out who they want themselves to be, and make it happen. ******** what everyone else says!
If you're fat and you wanna be fat, be fat! However, if you wanted to lower your risk of say, heart disease, or something, well then do it! I'm not your keeper: whatever floats your boat!
If you want to go on a diet because you think you need to lose weight, and it's not pressure from others, but rather your own personal realization and satisfaction, do it!! And seriously, it works both ways: don't tell a ******** who has thought it through and wants to lose weight FOR THEMSELVES that "they're pretty just the way they are! don't you ever change, you don't need to lose weight!!"
And so on. Sure, if you think they're pretty, that's your opinion. But telling them not to change? ******** OFF. It's not your body, it's not your mind, if you think it's so pretty do it yourself. You're allowed to have all the opinions in the world, but if you think you've got a right to push them on people, well, this is why I wrote it!
Hopefully you'll read it through, maybe you'll change yourself. Can't do it for you. You can't make people stop being people. They're just doing the same s**t you do. I mean, you CAN, but try to at least admit you're a manipulative ******** at times?
I mean, I am so damn manipulative at times, like horribly twisty talking and cunning and sly and I've got a penchant for bullshit, probably do to the understanding of how language works and all that like I've been writing for forever over...
The more important point, really, is that you need to realize when you're on the butt end, and then decide if they're right because they're right in your opinion, or if they're right because they're saying so.
FINALLY!!! WOOOOOOOOO!!!
THIS IS MY AWESOME ULTIMATE SUPER SUMMARIZED PROTIP WORD OF ADVICE!!
I see it TIME and TIME again, and it's so easy to do and fix and prevent and it'd solve all sorts of your emotional turmoils, my friends and companions!!
HERE it comes....
If you've got a problem with something, JUST ******** SAY SO.
Do you have a gun to your head? Will you die or put someone's life in danger if you spoke up?
No? THEN ******** TALK.
It ******** with me, guys, how many of you will mention you don't like such and such,
or don't approve of so and so,
or don't think we need to hang out round person here because of this reason,
or you're just getting stressed out by something but you don't wanna bother anyone....
Okay, dude, if I'm your friend, I'm sure I have absolutely annoyed the ******** out of you at one point or another. If I haven't, worry not! Your time will come. So, on what bullshit self-hating piece of bad logic excuse are you not running up to me and telling me what you think? Oh, so it's annoying? Cool, I'll tell you. This doesn't mean shut up and repress it, you silly geese!!
It means keep talking because if you need to get s**t off your chest it's YOUR s**t and my opinion towards it doesn't ******** matter unless I am directly involved.
If you're waltzing around with people at parties and you've got a problem with them, how bout we all try the whole "sitting down and telling them why they've pissed you off" method, instead of just being all quiet and changing rooms or telling me s**t about my other friends?
And don't tell me this is new s**t from my mouth, guys. Hell I might just paraphrase THIS part so you'll all see it.
I don't expect you to say anything to me that will make me pissed at you, provided you are completely honest. I'd rather hear from your mouth what you think, than hearing from someone else's mouth what you think of me. It just shows that you have the self-respect, maturity, decency, and confidence that ADULTS, SUCH AS US, adopt as our rite of passage.
And really, I don't wanna hear it anymore. I try really hard to keep myself from flinging s**t behind your backs. It's actually very tempting to jump in when I haven't said something to your face. It's also very tempting to form opinions about things I don't know the whole story behind...
Meaning, look, guys, you realize if you've been with the girl/boy you're with and I've hung out with both of you that I might actually consider you BOTH friends? I'm not taking sides. I'm Switzerland until one of you does something royally ******** up. Then America, ******** yea!!
I mean, you all know I'm rude. You all know I'm not politically correct. Realize that I don't intend to ever insult you with my rudeness, but if you keep insulting people, who are also my friends, then if I have to tell you to SHUT THE ******** UP I'm no longer hesitating to do so.
I expect the same from you. I'd love people to tell me to shut the ******** up when I lapse and bring things up.
I used to think that being "an adult" meant you got a job and you got a degree and you got a car and a house and found your love and did whatever you wanted with your life because you got all you need. HAHAHAHAHAHA, boy was I naive!!
I'm finding maturity isn't jack s**t about what you own or what you pay, what you make or do or who you ********. It's simply how you treat people, how you treat yourself, realizing the meaning of sacrifice and realizing that your altruism is selfish because it makes you happy to give to those you love, and how to accept responsibility for your own actions.
According to a bunch of people I end up saying this to, this is something some ******** never comprehend, and they go through their entire lives expecting redemption, forgiveness, absolution, second chances and helping hands and lucky breaks. By the way, that's why I'm Atheist.
I don't expect ANYONE to take kindness or compassion upon me. Compassion isn't something you should count on, EVER. Compassion's that thing that might never happen, but if it does, it'll help you understand how valuable and rare this opportunity is, and try not to ******** it up again. It gives you more motivation to change yourself for the better.
When you're teaching EVERYONE to dole it out because imaginary man says you'll burn if you don't, then you end up with a bunch of people, fully physically grown, acting like 8-year old kids.
It's like they never picked up that cognitive level of thinking where you realize: Hey! I'm an adult. People rely on me: people I work for and people I assist in my job, I might have kids, or a spouse, or an elderly family member, or a friend, or a pet, or a random person with a flat tire.
AND I rely on people!! People at stores and people who do my stocks or clean my movie theater or keep the toilets from overflowing with s**t, or people who serve me food with a smile even though their day may have been ten times worse than mine, and my friends, my lovers, my loved ones, my family, my coworkers and supervisors and managers so that I may be able to do my job efficiently, my teachers, whether I know them in person, or not.
You're relying on the person on the other line of an eBay purchase, to ship your things without breaking them, in a timely manner. All you're seeing is a small little line of text with a moniker in place. How often do you get your package a day later and then go like "dumbass b***h can't ship a damn package stupid a** postal workers grumble grumble grumble"
But why? What in the hell makes you so ******** angry about it? Or, gamer rage?!?! Okay, sure, you're been at this part for 3 hours, but ******** dude, it's not like that console was 99 cents at Walmart, so quit tossing it around like it's a tank or some bullshit. Didn't you ever learn to respect property, to take care of your things and treasure them? To not buy useless s**t you don't need, that you really don't have to spend so much money if you just maintain what you have instead of tossing it?
I mean, really? Just, road rage, gamer rage, it's all just a side effect of you penning up your frustration towards s**t, and letting it go on some innocent bystander. That's just ********, dude. ********. If you're mad, get mad at the reason behind it. If you're on your LAST straw with your boss, if you've talked to him/her time and time again and nothing happens, then you start looking for another place to work, or you talk to their boss, anything. Just quit seething in spot.
I know, I know, it's HARD. Everyone tells you to SMILE and BE HAPPY and guess what? If we were always smiling and being happy all the damn time then we'd evolved without you know, testosterone, adrenaline, inner sadism, a penchant for violence. NO, ********, WE'RE ANGRY HUMANS. WE'RE AN ANGRY SPECIES.
People tell you to never unload your s**t all over anyone, to not be a "burden" or make others uncomfortable. ******** those people. If you have friends, and they're your real friends:
Well, I can't speak for everyone, but part of friendship to me is having someone to vent to, so your burden is lifted. I take that in the reverse, because if I'm your friend I don't want you to carry a huge burden on your own if you're struggling with it. I'll help you out, dude. It's the least I could do. It really is, actually. You don't have to loan money or pick them up or cover food or let them spend the night. You can deny me all that s**t and you're still my friend.
I don't want to owe you cash, food, etc. I'm the kind of person who usually has a list of who I owe a favor, and whether you absolve me or not is very irrelevant, because I like being even and I like being able to feel I'm standing as your equal. Owing people sometimes keeps me from being able to do that. It's a thing I gotta work with, because it's really not a pride issue, so much as I always freak ten years from now someone will call in on a favor, and I won't be able to complete it somehow. Then I'd feel like I let someone down who really needed it and they didn't do that to me so it's a half-sided ********.
All I want from you as a friend, is someone to talk to, hang out with, and be myself around. I don't have to be polite like I do around my coworkers, and I don't have to deliberately omit things like I do around my family, and I don't have to necessarily shut my mouth up because I'm terrified you'll be offended and see me again in a cold alley someday like I feel around some random people, and I don't have to feel like I'm talking about something and that person has no clue what I'm talking about, and I don't have to feel judged, or like I'm gonna ******** up, or like I have to worry about all the s**t I worry about.
It's not like I think if I lost my job or got injured that'd suddenly, someone would have an offer in my hand and pay my hospital bills. I don't expect material anything.
What I do regret, sadly, is that there are a few people I really need to sit down with and tell them why I don't see them in the same light I saw them all those years back. I gotta tell them my outlook on it, and I gotta get over the frustration that's going to occur if they think I hate them, or if I offend them, and that RIGHT there is exactly why I don't see them in the same light, amazingly enough.
If I can't tell you that I think you ******** up without you actually getting pissed at me, or angry, or spreading bullshit or telling people I can't come to your parties boo hoo or whatever, if you're actually taking critcism from me as your friend who really doesn't want to see you ******** up or crying or anything, and you want to be mad at ME for s**t? Well, we'll see. That's the kind of s**t that helps me realize who's worth it and who isn't. If I wanted to talk to a teenager I'd have a kid and wait.
Oh, also, just throwing it in the ring here, but: HEYYY, if you've realized it's been a while since I talked to you, and I'm not as excited as I was to hang out with you, ask yourself: how old is my boyfriend/girlfriend?
There you go. I've been trying my best to avoid jailbait parties. It's not high school anymore, and I miss it too, but damn, it's not the greatest s**t. If you graduated with me, we've been out of high school for 5 DAMN YEARS. It's not only weird to have a 16 or 17 year old dating you, but it's ******** illegal, and no, I DON'T place enough trust or responsibility in YOUR chick or your dude to think they wouldn't pull something stupid like crying statutory.
Why? Because yes, at one point in life, I too was a teenage girl with a v****a!! And you bet your ******** a** the thought crossed my mind, and you bet your a** I thought of using my tits to get my way, or sexing people up, and you bet your a** the only time I saw people who are my age now was when I was drinking. People our age group now are booze providers to kids. That's it, really. We're administers of a good time, but if that good time gets raided, it's us with cuffs on. Remember, paranoia is good, and cops aren't your friends.
This is why I don't do beach parties. Donuts on the sand, trash everywhere, and I'm puckering my a*****e because one random GIRL(not woman, GIRL, 17 years old) is wandering around within PLAIN sight of the cops with a beer in her hand.
Who had beer? Me! Who could go to jail? Me! Did I give her the beer? NO!! BUT, you will get the blame because you didn't prevent it, dumbass! And then you're in jail or fined and if there's anything I've learned from some of my friends, it's that I'm glad I haven't gone to jail and I sure don't wanna start now.
Btw, I really don't remember who she was. I stopped talking to her after I found out her age, fairly early in the night, and therefore, nada. For all I know, hanging with the crowds I do, she could have left our flocks or completely changed the way she looks... and I'm not willing to bet money on it, but I've had many a jailbait come up to me:
Hey, remember me!??! From the one party??! NO. I DO NOT.
Look, I've been waxing my a** over adulthood and what it means to be mature. When I was your age, young jailbait kiddies, I thought that, like you, my opinions were far more profound and mature than the other teenagers I knew.
I was right. You're also right. BUT, you're still naive, and young, and impulsive.
Did YOU know that as you grow older, if you get into a committed relationship, after time, it's not just about ******** like rabbits? I mean, I actually kinda understand where those sitcoms were coming from nagging marriage all the time, because I bet, when I'm in my 40s, that I'll definitely have my times where I'm gonna be the most stereotypical naggy b***h wife ever and Jon will just be all like SHUT UP WOMAN but then later we won't, and it's just nice to know that you're with your best friend until you kick the bucket.
Did you know that you really need to start masturbating copiously RIGHT NOW, because it really helps you have longer and better sex later? Hell, don't ******** other jailbait yet. Just rub it out, figure out your s**t, someday hook up on a one-night stand and they'll be all I'M NOT WORTHY.
Did you know I will not give you a beer if you can't prove you're over 18? Why? Because once you're a legal adult, I'm still not gonna hand you the beer, but now I can punch you in the face if you take one and avoid child abuse.
OH, yes, another reason to avoid JB parties: some of that dramatic, beer-pong-with-natty-lite bullshit is so infuriating I suddenly understand the sheer amount of control your parents(and mine too) have to not choke your little lungs. And you're smoking!! s**t I didn't start til I was 19. I ain't buying you a pack, and you can't have one of mine, and why don't you wait until you can get a reliable job to pay for your own drugs before you go doing them?
Ah, this, well... this could turn into a rant. It's just like, I dunno, every older person in a bar or club who talks to me and uses the "when you're older, you'll get it" line. I mean, damn, it used to annoying as ********!! Like being a kid and having the "because I said so" line thrown at you, you can't argue it and it makes you wanna go forth and scream and beat your hands upside your chest:
I AM AN ADULT!! I AM AN EQUAL AND I WILL DO MY OWN BIDDING!!! RARHRHGHNGKGL!!!!
And then... GROK! I got what they meant. They aren't talking down to you, and I'm not talking down to you, I'm just saying, it's something that you cannot "get" until you "get it." No other way to explain it. You're still kids, you can speculate all you want, but you're still kids, and you're American kids raised with the carefree lack of responsibility that is actually given and taken very seriously to teenagers in Europe and other countries throughout the world.
Because hey, you're not nearly given even close to the amount of responsibility they are, you don't even know how to handle the s**t you're telling me you're good on, and I'm too paranoid to have you prove it, and I just feel comfortable listening to you guys say you can handle s**t, then tossing your cell phone because "OMG MY BOYFRIEND ARHAGDJAK BROKE UP WITH ME BAWAHAHAHA I SHOULD CUT MYSELF."
See, someday, that s**t won't land you attention, just out in an alley by yourself. When you're reigned that s**t in and figured it out, you'll probably be hitting up where I'm at now, and we'll go get some drinks.
Now, this entire thing has taken me over 10 hours to compose. I'm off to work on no sleep!
But hopefully someone's read it, and someone's commented, and my list of friends isn't composed entirely of a TL biggrin R lazy braindead variety.
This was a Public Service Announcement by your friendly local mental activist, reminding you that only YOU can prevent YOURSELF. Thanks!
 Simim · Mon Aug 08, 2011 @ 09:06pm · 0 Comments |
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