Many things change and yet stay the very same.
Much like humans.
I won't get into much of my life detail, partially cuz it'll be crappy, and partially cuz it sucked but anywho but it wasn't easy.
At all.
Hell my cousin had practically the same life and you know what she did? She killed herself. I have never been outright suicidal. There have been times that I've wondered what my death would be like, what my funeral would be like, how much I would truly be missed.
Then I remember the standing room only packed church that cold February day in 2003 when she was said fairwell to.
I didn't realize till just now that it had come upon me again. The time that she died, the time I would never see her smiling face, joking about her boyfriend, or about how life was.
How she had encouraged me.
We were close but never super close. I called her a friend and hopefully she thought of me as someone she might turn to.
But she didn't.
I can never take back that day on that cold February when she decided dying would be best of all for her but maybe her memory will help me move on with my life finally. To be myself and not care who gives a damn.
There will always be regrets in life, and yes she will be apart of those regrets, but also that will make her memories I had with her that much sweeter.
Thank you for living Stacy.
God always takes his Angels home first.
solarssun Community Member 
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