- by The Bass of Marcie |
- Original Avatar
- | Submitted on 08/26/2013 |
- Skip
- Title: Bonny Child
- Artist: The Bass of Marcie
-
Description:
The oceans are a broiling mass, foam rolling over the ship with each salty spray. The air fills with a gusty roar; surely Charybdis was closing around the ship--it seemed even Neptune was against her--Bonny whirled around to where a massive tentacle was cracking the prow, sword brandished...
"...What on EARTH are you doing, young lady?!"
Her mother stood at the bathroom's door with an incredulous expression as she eyed the surprised child.
"...Ahoy...?" - Date: 08/26/2013
- Tags: bonny child pirate marcie
- Report Post
Comments (4 Comments)
- Balbora - 09/04/2013
- so cute x3 and perfect story! made me smile^^
- Report As Spam
- The Saint of Good Timing - 09/03/2013
- Aaaaaand I'll shut up, right after I gently point out the tense shift from present to past in the story. Didn't ruin it though - it took a second read for me to notice. And, I know, this is the avatar arena, not tge writing arena, so it doesn't much matter. Just thought I'd be helpful!
- Report As Spam
- The Saint of Good Timing - 09/03/2013
- Damn character limit. I wanted to add that aside from being a refreshing premise, the story is also very richly detailed despite its brevity, and all in all very well composed. I'd dare presume you're an aspiring writer? I'd love to see your work. ; )
- Report As Spam
- The Saint of Good Timing - 09/03/2013
- Dude. Perfect. Adorable, well made avatar, and one of the few examples of a backstory that ADDS to it, rather than detracting. Maybe because its not melodramatic emo poetry about how the bathtub is symbolic of her entrapment in a world of monotony and emotional anguish because no one understands her, and the toy boat is not an artifact of ancient eldritch power with which she slaughters the weak in a gory show of homicidal demonic superiority. LE SIGH. Kudos! 5/5
- Report As Spam
