- Henrietta was a small girl. In fact, you could pick her up with just one hand because she literally was small enough to fall asleep on your palm. Little Henrietta was teased by the other kids at her school because she was different from them in size. “Tiny Henrietta, she’ll never be better because if you pick her up and drop her, she’ll go SPLAT!”, was a common song they used to sing at her during recess. Amazingly enough, Henrietta didn’t care much at all about their chides. In fact, she was quite happy with her petit size. She felt that it made her special! One day while walking home from school (which took at least 5 times as long compared to the other children who lived in her area that also attended the same area as her), she happened upon something while passing by a jungle of a grass lawn. Upon the ground, it shimmered slightly with the glare of the sun. Henrietta slowly walked over to it to get a better view. To her surprise it was an iPODnanoMINISCULE, the most recent addition to the iPOD family that was ten times as small compared to its older relatives! It was apparently abandoned because the original owner was not small enough to use it. “Oh, you poor iPODnanoMINISCULE! I shall take you home and clean you and clothe you and love you forever”, said she to the soulless object. Two weeks later, Henrietta was taken to court by the original owner under the false premise that she had stolen the music playing device from him. Along with the iPOD, Henrietta’s family was forced to use Henrietta’s college funds to pay for the “psychological inconveniences” that the original owner claimed he had to go through. People are serious asshats.
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