• Thud.
    That’s the only sound. The sound of my feet on the pavement of a highway. The white line to my right, the deep ditch to my left. Cars pass by me without a second glance.
    I have to get there, quick. Why am I in such a hurry? My lungs burn, my feet pound and my mouth is dry. I need some water. Maybe I can drink the rain as I run.
    I’m not going fast enough. I have to go faster.
    I push myself harder and harder, to the point that I’m about to break. I feel like if I go any harder I’m gonna kill myself. I have to get there so why would I push myself to the point of death?
    There’s light behind me, a truck is pulling over. I look back and it’s his cousin. I run to the truck and thankfully hop in, curling myself up in the bench. I grab his jacket sitting in the middle and cover up. Turing the music up louder, letting the music pour into my soul and steady my breathing. My eyes droop…
    Hang on. I’m coming. I’ll be there soon. Hang on just a little longer…
    I’m coming…
    The truck stops and I jerk awake, eyes snapping open so fast I stay cross eyed for a few moments. There are people everywhere. I jump out, not feeling the pain that I felt before, there’s too much adrenaline pumping through my veins for that, I’m completely numb. I run again and make into the house in a matter of seconds. Running through the door down this hallway through this room, not knowing why I took this turn or that.
    I’m too late. I didn’t make it in time. What have I done? It’s my fault. It’s my fault. I should have gotten here faster.
    Without warning I drop to the floor. Seeing his blood and body. There’s blood all over the room and on the floor. It’s gotten on my hands. I scream. Anger, hatred, frustration, failure and desperation for a time machine.
    I failed. I didn’t help anyone. Why did I think I could?
    I’m worthless, useless and stupid.
    I clamp my hands over my mouth, his blood smears on my face. I’m crying, screaming and wailing. That’s all I can manage to do. There’s nothing I can do to change the past.
    He’s gone. That’s it.
    Screaming so loud, crying so hard. My head begins to throb and ache. I have to get out of here, but my limbs don’t seem to be working. There’s literally nothing I can do or go. My body is numb and unrelenting to my brain’s commands to get up and runaway.
    Someone’s arms wrap around my waist. They lift my body up off the floor and the pools of blood. I don’t have the will to fight back anymore. I look at the person who’s connected to the arms and it’s the cousin.
    Seeing grief and compassion in his eyes I wrap my arms around him and cry into his shoulder. There’s nothing to live for anymore. There’s no hope for me.
    He strokes my hair and tries to calm me down. The next thing I know, we’re on the couch. I’m still crying and he’s just holding me, soothing me. It’s slowly working.
    His blood is on me and is transferring to his clothes and body. I can’t believe he’s gone for good.
    My breathing slows and becomes even. I’m silently crying, letting the tears roll down my face, not bothering to wipe them away. My face is blotched and red, tear streaked and tense. My mind is contorted with grief, rage and the sudden thirst for vengeance.
    So what now?