• Many years ago, I experienced a dream that seemed so real, that it has followed me through my life for the past ten years. This dream encompasses the alternate life that I live and explores what could very well be my future. This is that dream, and the time to share it is now.

    She stood there with such grace and possessed an aura of authority surrounding her. She looked around the dimly lit room, the dust flowing magically across the pane of the nearby window. She motioned to me; yet I did not yield. I stood frozen in my spot, mesmerized by the events that were quickly unfolding. She beckoned once more, and my feet, with a mind of their own, marched forward in a slow cadence of mystical significance.

    As the song my cadence sung to her came to an end, I found myself unable to speak. I looked into her brightly shining blue eyes, and I knew what was asked of me. "Brandon" she whispered in an angelic voice that seemed too ephemeral to comprehend. "Step Forward." As I approached, my hands started to tremble slightly. Unsure of myself for the first time in many years, I slowly proceeded forward. I said nothing, simply just looked at her with a fiery intent.

    The series of events that followed are still a blur to me.
    Even after all these years, I could never deduce where the others came from, but they did come. What seemed like a quiet night turned quickly into a wedding; time moved swiftly like sand through an hour glass. I was kneeling in front of her. A crown upon my head, made of the finest gold and adorned with diamonds from another time, only confirmed what my heart knew, and what my brain struggled to comprehend.
    It was surreal.

    The flowers fell like a summer's rain, the distant cheering from the crowd seemed but a faint whisper to my ears. I was in another place, another time, and I didn't want to leave. She was my queen, and she was my wife. As I rose, the weight of the world left my shoulders, replaced by a new inner light, one that seemed to reach the darkest areas of my soul, and which I swore was the hidden source of light behind the windows.

    What had become an inner peace also caused a blindness that was the source of my betrayal. As I stood there, the world spinning around, I knew not what was real, or nor what was part of the illusion. As my mind and my heart slowed, I began to realize an abrupt change in the atmosphere.

    The windows, which once held such magical light, now seemed cold, dead, like the frozen wind abused hills of the arctic. The once whispering chatters were no longer apparent. Just the wind, finding its way through the pane, whistled at my dismay. The dread filling my blood, and with my heart heavy I closed my eyes and turned slowly, wishing that what I feared wasn't true.

    As my eyes opened, I knew it was too late. The sun, which once warmed my heart, now shown pallid in my face, a costly reminder that it was a dream. The person whom, without knowing, I felt so strongly about was also just a dream. I closed my eyes again, wishing, hoping that I could force myself back to that happy place. My eyes strained closed, my heart pounded, and yet nothing I did brought her back.

    As the years went on, I still saw her in my dreams, this distant prize that I could never reach. The brief moments that we shared in this dream life seemed to last forever, and yet passed in mere moments. The life was never quite fulfilled, yet enough to keep me going. It is these very dreams that are a burden in my heart, and the reason I keep hope in a world filled with violence and pain. I remind myself with each passing day, with each set of that once cheerful sun, that I am closer to finding that dream.