• I swore to myself I wouldn't cry, I'd be strong, for myself if not for you. The newest casualty in the war of broken promises. Tears that have been pricking my eyelids all day well up and soundlessly run down my cheeks, leaving their quicksilver footprints on my skin. Our eyes connect, yours full of the sorrow that's ripping my heart in two, and a slow, sad smile curls your lips. I shake my head, pleading, begging you... but we both know, don't we, it has to be this way.

    You wrap your arms around my shoulders, pulling me into your chest as my tears run faster, my fingers gripping your shirt as if I can keep you with me, as if my hands can make you stay. Numbly, I feel your hands sliding down my hair, down my back, your murmurs of meaningless words filling my ears. My tears slow for a moment, and you uncurl my fingers from your shirt, tilting my chin with one hand the way you have a thousand times before. Your last kiss brushes against my lips, mist on a lake, and I stop myself pulling you closer. We're both lost if I do. Instead I let my eyes flicker open, watching the fire dull to embers in your gaze. Your touch drops from my skin, you turn, your eyes linger on me for a split second more before you tear them away. And you walk, and I watch, and I let tears fall and fall, and still you keep walking. And I tell myself you'll come back. I promise myself you will. And the death toll rises again.

    You can't stay, we both know it, we've always known it. But for this one moment, let me have my illusion.