• After I got home that night I felt so confident about my voice. When i opened the door to my room i stared at my guitar and piano for a second, then spotted my notebook filled with songs i never got the chance to play. As i opened it i smelt the aroma of my old house. The smell filled the air with playful and hurtful memories. I felt like crying reading my depressing songs i wrote when i found out my previous boyfriend died in a car accident. As i read the last line saying, forever in my heart you will always be, holding me gently before i break. i looked over my shoulder and grabbed my guitar, then started playing the song. My eyes filled with tears, remembering me and him running in the city park, laughing for no good reason. I stopped for a second and listened to the silence, while I realized I would never get the chance to see him again.
    As i sat on my bed with my notebook and guitar, as looked through all the songs i ever written. Most of them are songs dedicated to him, Nikko, when we were still together. My eyes bursted in tears again, while i closed the notebook and cried in the corner of my room. My cell phone began to ring and picked it up saying, "hullo?" with sobs in the backround.
    "Elena! What's wrong?" said Brandon.
    "I- I don't want to talk about it." i said, my voice cracking over the tears.
    "Elena, please? I want to know what's wrong."
    "Just leave- leave me alone." i whispered as i hung up the phone. I started to cry even more remembering tonight, from happy to crying like hell. I put my head on my knees as i felt my phone vibrate. It was a text message from Brandon saying: "I'm sorry for bugging you again, I just wanted to know what was wrong. You can tell me anything Elena, I'm sure I will understand." i thought for a minute, my sobs beginning to slow. I pressed the keys on my phone so roughly i thought my phone would break. "It's just memories... that i dont want to remember." I sent the message then heard a voice in the back of my head. It was Nikko saying, Forever in my heart you'll be. I love you. I stopped for a second to absorb his voice in my head, then felt two drops of tears going down my cheek. The voice then said, I'll always be with you, you just got the remember- i started to scream to get the voice out of my head. My mom ran into the room with her head curlers in her black satin hair. "What's wrong, honey?" she said in a sweet voice.
    "Nikko... I- he's gone..." i said, my voice breaking. i'm not gone, I'm always here Elena. His voice was so clear, i could almost picture him there with me.
    "Do you want me to leave you alone hun?" my mom asked nicely.
    "Yes, I'm sorry." i said. I sat there for another two hours, looking at the clock strike three.
    I started to remember his face, so perfect and clear, and his soothing voice that made me tickle with happiness. He was an artist, a song writer, and a singer. He would give me pictures every once and awhile with letters spelling "I love you" and "You are my life", or he would call me any random time at night to sing me a song i never heard before. He made me happy, even though we both knew we had so many problems with everything else in our life. His dad was in jail for selling weed, and his mom was always out to work. My mom was always out of town for her show music, and my dad didn't really care about me and my brother. My brother is in college now, so I haven't heard from him since Christmas. To each other, we were the only good parts of our lives.
    The night before he died was the strongest memory i have of him. He was singing to me like he would do like any other night, but then his mom came in the room wondering who he was talking to. He told her it was me, his girlfriend, and his mom told him to never talk to me again. While I listened to them yell at each other i heard Brandon yell at his mom, "Mom, I'm sorry but I love her. She's the best thing that EVER happened to me." Hearing him exagerate the word 'ever' made my heart beat as fast as a jackrabbit. His mom slammed his bedroom door without saying a word and he finally started to talk to me again. "Did you hear that? Or do I have to repeat myself?"
    "I- I love you too Nikko." i said almost speechless.
    "You are important to me Elena, whatever happens to us, I'll always be there to stop your tears."
    "How do you know I would cry?" i said so surely.
    "Everyone cries, and when you do, I feel the pain too."
    My heart felt like bursting out of my skin, and i felt speechless. After breathing for a couple more seconds I said, "Crying isn't always the answer."
    "But to me its like a call for me to help you. I will always be here Elena, remember that."
    "I won't forget, and when i do cry, that's your call!" i said. he laughed at the way i said that so happily. then he said, "Yes, it's surely my call. Even if we are thousand miles apart, I will find a way to make you feel better." I didn't get the chance to say anything before he started to sing another song. I fell asleep to his voice, and when he finally realized he said, "Good night, I love you." I woke right there and whispered, "I love you too."
    I sat in the corner and cried as i remember our last conversation. His voice kept telling me, I'm always here Elena, please don't cry. I closed my eyes and focused on his soothing voice. Why was it tonight that I heard it again? It was his promise, the last promise he ever told me to keep. I believed him, and now as i cry because of him, his single voice is putting that tickling happiness back in my spine. I put my headphones in my ears and blasted the music so loud that i couldn't hear my own thoughts. I fell asleep with the song, Wherever You Will Go, the song Nikko sang to me the night before he died.