• Chapter 1: Loveless Pain

    Matt started to move fast with the music, so fast I couldn’t keep up. His feet were in rhythm that I couldn’t feel. The music went faster and so did he, his eyes closed and at that moment I wished I could be able to know what he was thinking. When the music went low, a man came and stepped on the biggest log that was on the white sand beach. Matt stopped dancing and so did I. His eyes gracefully stayed closed but flickering around in the socket. I watch the man silently with jitters in my spine.

    “Hey, hey! Party peoples! Okay, I’m gonna slow the music down for the lovers now. I bet they want the chance to be closer together. Here is a girl’s request and the song is called Broken by Seether!” he yelled through the microphone. Matt shot open his eyes and smiled brilliantly at me. His eyes dance with heat and he pulled me closer. He must have known that it was me who requested the song. It was our song anyway. Yes, we are friends but we just wanted our own song. When the song began, he started to hum the rhythm in my ear and I whispered back the lyrics in his. We just listened and slow danced, not noticing the world around us, there was only us. Since we didn’t talk, my mind started to wander. Then I remembered the day we first met...

    “Hey, Can I play with you guys?” I asked softly in a high pitch voice.

    “No! You got cooties! Get away!” one boy screamed at my face and pushed me down on cement. All I wanted was to play tag with them and maybe be friends. Tears welled up in my eyes but I fought them back. Like my mother use to say, don’t show them weakness or they will use it against you.

    “Hey! Leave her alone!” a tall, pale skinny boy yelled. He wore a black shirt with gray sleeves. He grabbed my wrist and picked me up, back to my feet.

    “Come on, you can play with me!" he squeaked and I smiled warmly at him.

    “Thanks” I said when we got away from their ear shot.

    “I’m Matt. And you’re my Best friend now, okay?” he asked me and his eyes gleamed with hope.

    “Okay! I’m Ava; you’re my Best friend now too,” I laughed and hugged him. My long black hair flowed in to my face and that was the day I met Matt. He was six while I was five. Now I was fifteen and he was sixteen. Older but still Best friends forever.

    There was silence, or at least that's what I thought because I ignored the world but as soon as I heard his gasp for breath, I opened my eyes and that's when I heard the screams. I saw his eyes bulge in agony and fear and I happened to look down to his chest and it was caked with red fresh blood. A knife was staked through his back to his heart. I screamed in terror and he fell limp in my arms, causing me to stumble to the ground with him laying next to me. Blood ran from his lips and nose and on to my shirt. We just laid there in silence, I didn't know if he was still alive or if he was already gone but I did realize one thing, that’s when I noticed this whole time I loved him and he loved me. His throat let out one last gurgle and more red liquid slid out from his lips. And my true love died. Black spots filled my eye sight and I looked to the sky. There was one blue star out of millions that night and I named it after my him. Matt..

    *few hours later..*

    When I opened my eyes, I started to panic. Was it all a dream? Was Matt really alive? When I looked up, I saw gleaming stars but the blue star has disappeared. I tried to sit up but knife snagging pain shot through me. I looked down to see red liquid around me but it wasn’t mine. I saw Matt’s arms around me but I knew he was gone, sticky dried red blood covered the ground everywhere, everyone was gone or so I thought, the dance was over but the mystery just begun. I remembered screaming, screaming and blood. Did I kill Matt? Why did it seem so fuzzy? While I thought this, someone took Matt out of my arms, also me out his. I didn’t see you it was, darkness filled around me and I fell unconscious.

    *1 year later...*

    I awoke to the birds chirping outside my window. My brown long hair fell into my face. “Great, another wonderful Monday morning.” I grumbled sarcastically to myself. I got up and sat in front of my mirror. No, I’m not one of those girls who wear make-up and want to impress boys. There was only one boy for me, and everyone says I killed him. They say it so much, I’m starting believe it. I don’t remember that night much, so how do I know if I did or didn’t kill him? I sighed angrily and couldn’t figure out who that girl in the mirror was. She had the same stringy almond hair and chalky pale skin as me. But those eyes seemed dead, like she had no soul. One day I have to realize that; the girl is really me. I walked to my closet and pulled out a blue sweatshirt and faded gray jeans. But everyday I still wondered who that girl was. I quickly got dressed and combed my hair. I looked at the clock and rolled my eyes. 7:25 am. “Great, now I’m late! Can it get any worse?” I demanded to no one really.

    I grabbed an energy bar and snatched my back pack. It slung from my shoulder to my waist, and my note book fell out and crumpled to the floor. I cursed under my breath and picked it up. It wasn’t any notebook but Matt’s poem and lyrics book. Tears threaten to fall but I held them back. Wait till the night, just wait Ava; you’ll have time to cry but not just yet. I sighed again and walked out the door. It was raining. Perfect. I was so sick of this place, of this town and these people. I just don’t want to think about today. I was sick of my ex-best friends; I was sick of my life and sick of this house. I just wanted to crawl into a ball and cry till I fell asleep. I climbed in to my red rusty ford truck and slammed the door. I put the key in and started the car. The car wasn’t new but it wasn’t old either.It roared like a panther and I turned to the high way. The high school was only fifteen minutes away but I knew I would have to fake an excuse to say why I was late. I snorted, yeah right. They don’t care, not anymore. “Not after Matt’s death.” I heard my self say.

    I finally got to the school and walked into my second period class. Luckily I was on time for this class. I just turned sixteen seven days ago and just got my license and me a new car. I quickly sat in my seat and got out my science homework. Yes, homework over the weekend. What a bore but what else was there to do when you’re a so called murderer? Then, catching me out of my depressed mood, a new boy walked in the room and his gaze searched around the room and then fixed on me. He had green eyes, jet black and turquoise blue hair, and sparkling white teeth. I couldn’t help but stare back at him but then i realized what I was doing and I quickly turned away, with anger and disgust at myself. I messed up, I shouldn’t have done that. The guy walked over by me and sat in the seat next to me. He smiled at me and studied me with temptation. But the thing was he wasn’t staring at my body but seemed like he was trying to find my soul.

    “Hi, I’m Malachi. Um I’m new.” he whispered to me shyly and I wished he didn’t see me, why can’t everyone just leave me be?

    “Look, let me make this easy for you. I’m not a person who likes to have friends or date. If you want anyone, take your pick from those barbie clones at the girly girl table.” I hissed to him. His face formed in to shock then he snorted in disgust.

    “I’m not like that. Yeah, I can see you’re not datable but I’m sure we can at least be friends. I hate girls that copy others but I do like you, you just seem different,” he chuckled slightly. The crazy thing is, I knew he meant that we were now friends, and he hated those Barbie clones as much as me, and I was really okay with that. That’s when Trina, the queen Barbie came over and smiled at Malachi gloriously. Then her eyes burned into mine and I saw fear flicker in her baby blue eyes. As if I was going to jump over my desk and attack her. Trust me, if I had the energy, I probably would.

    “Come on, come with us and don’t hang with the dead girl,” She smiled wistfully, thinking she had him in her grasp.

    “Let me think about that," he started, looked into my eyes and then back at Trina, "hmm, I thought about it and I have one answer for you. I don’t like you, so get over yourself. Oh and I think you owe her an apology,” He demanded, with sternness in his voice. Trina and I looked at each other in bewilderment at the words he just spoke. He defended me.

    “Whatever, I hope you get killed like her last boyfriend,” She growled with a sugar coated voice. She said it to Malachi but I knew it was mostly directed at me. I grimaced and sorrow shook through me. How could she say that? Then again, I shouldn’t be surprised. He wouldn't budge, all he did was glare at her and shooed her away like she was nothing special. She stomped her foot and walked away. He looked back at me but I turned so I couldn’t see his face. Tears welled up in my eyes; pain broke through in my chest. I bet if he knew the full truth, he would turn his back to me like all my so called friends did. Would he fear me and make fun? Would he back away and whimpered like everyone else? I looked back at him and he didn’t have anger, or fear or even pity. There was only pain. He continued to try to search for my soul, but I knew he wouldn’t find anything. I was here by body, not by soul.