• It was the day before Itachi's birthday, and Kisame was dreading to figure out what he should do for his partner on his special day. He decided to ask for suggestions from the other members. He went to the living room and found Hidan, Deidara, and Sasori in there.
    "Hey, what do you think Itachi-san would want for his birthday?" Kisame asked the other akatsuki members who were in the living room.
    "Let us give him a ritual of Jashin!" Hidan exclaimed as he jumped up and stood on the coffee table, proud of his idea.
    "Um...I don't think Itachi would like that, Hidan..." Kisame told him with a sweat drop.
    "D@mn heathens..." Hidan muttered.
    "Let's blow him up, un!" Deidara yelled. Sasori threw a rock at his partner.
    "You two are dumb @$$es..." Sasori said to them annoyed by their stupid answers. "He should get something that will ACTUALLY please him, like kidnapping his brother and letting Itachi torture him."
    Sasori's idea was actually good, unlike the other two. "And it's settled! We will break into go to Oroshimaru's lair and 'borrow' Sasuke! Let's go!"
    The three remained on the couch.
    "Why aren't you coming?" Kisame asked the trio puzzled.
    "It's out day off. We're not wasting our f'n time," Hidan said with an irritated tone.
    Kisame got an idea. "I'll give you $20, I'll let you sacrifice Orochimaru, and I'll let you blow up his base."
    "Deal (un)!" they said simaltaneouslly (sp?)
    At Orochimaru's lair~:
    "Oh...Higher, Sasuke... More...More Sasuke, more!! Keep going!! It's not in the right position! Lower...Lower...That's it!!!!!" Orochimaru said to Sasuke.
    "Is the picture frame okay yet?" Sasuke asked flatly (hahaha it was a picture frame).
    Kisame, Deidara, Sasori, and Hidan crashed through the wall of Orochimaru's lair. "HOO HAW!"
    "Oh, c'mon! What the h3ll is wrong with you people?! I just got that wall fixed after those konoha kids demolished (sp? X3) it! There's a f'n door right there!" Orochimaru screamed furiouslly.
    "Uh...we're going to take him for a little while," Kisame said as he picked up Sasuke.
    "Wha?! You can't----" Orochimaru didn't get to finish because Hidan stabbed him in the heart.
    "Sacrifice! Sacrifice! Wh-whoo~!" Hidan sang as he ran around in circles. Sasori facepalmed and muttered 'idiot'.
    "C'mon, let's go!" The foursome and Sasuke left the lair.
    "Katsu!" Deidara yelled out, causing the base to explode.
    "Where are you taking me?" Sasuke asked with no emotion.
    "To your brother, un," Deidara muttered.
    "Oh, okay. Now I get to show him my moves... I do not lack hatred," the raven haired boy said. He then looked at Deidara. "Hey...you're that guy I killed."
    "What, un?! You didn't kill me, un!" Deidara yelled with a scream look.
    "Yes, I did," Sasuke replied to the blonde.
    "You guys are both wrong. You and Deidara battled and since Deidara is a dumb @$$, he ended himself as 'art', which in my perspective, call 'suicide'," Sasori explained (yeah, Sasori gets to be the genius in my story! Got a problem with that, hmmmm???!)
    "B-but, danna...."
    "Read the manga, brat."
    Akatsuki HQ~:
    "Where are we going to put this kid, un?" Deidara asked. "'Cause I don't want him in my room."
    "Put him in Hidan's room. Leave him in your closet tied up until tomorow," Kisame ordered.
    Next Day~(Itachi's brithday:3):
    Itachi woke up with silence. He was usually woken up by Kisame, but not today. He then remembered. Today was his birthday. Aw, shiit. What's Kisame going to do now? Itachi thought. Last year was a disaster...
    Itachi woke up at 1:00AM with the whole akatsuki surrounding him blowing on party horns. Itachi twitched and covered his head with his pillow.
    "Get up, you b!tch! We're celebrating the day you're going to die sooner!!" Hidan screamed in Itachi's ear. Itachi shot him a death glare.
    "HERE ITACHI-SEMPAI! YOU HAVE MANY PRESENTS!!" Tobi screamed happily (more like mentally insane XD) as he threw Itachi's presents at him. Itachi twitched again. o.e
    "Cake, un!" Deidara said loudly. He put the cake in front of Itachi. Itachi didn't blow out the flame of the candle using his mouth, but instead got up and backed away from the cake and helled (sp?XD) out a long fan to make the flame disappear. As the flame faded, the cake exploded and was on everyone but Itachi.
    End Flashback.
    Itachi got up from his bed and exited his room. He went to the kitchen and was greeted by Kisame and a plate full of dango and a box of pocky. Itachi did a small grin and sat down and began to eat his food.
    "Oh, my Jashin... Itachi looks...happy, un," Deidara had a eek expression. (XD)
    "Oh, Itaaaaaaaaaaachi-san~! We have a present for you~!" Kisame called over to his partner with a sing-song voice. Kisame brought out a fairly large box and gave it to his partner. Itachi was curious about what was in the box, but didn't open it right away.
    Itachi lifted an eyebrow. "This won't explode, right Kisame?"
    Kisame and the others nodded.
    Itachi slowly opened the box and Sasuke was inside tied to a chair in a light pink frilly dress with white lace stockings. Itachi smiled at the sight of his brother.
    Deidara fainted when he saw Itachi smile.
    Itachi picked up the tied up Sasuke. "I was wrong brother... You do not lack hatred..." Itachi started. Sasuke looked a bit happy when his older brother said that. But, then, Itachi let go of his younger brother and dropped him on the floor. Itachi pointed to Sasuke in a striking pose. "YOU LACK AWESOMENESS!!!!!!"
    Everyone in the room had a "WTF?!" face in the room. Itachi dragged Sasuke into his room. Itachi put headphones on his head.
    "N-nii-san? Wh-what are you g-going to do?" Sasuke asked his older brother frightened.
    Itachi had a long evil smile on his face. twisted "What I should've done a long time ago, you chicken @$$ed hair emo wannabe." Itachi took out a sterio and pressed play. It was playing the dreaded song 'Baby' by Justin Bieber.
    "No...no...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Sasuke screamed.

    Happy Birthday, Itachi-san~!!