Raven Black - Girl Dead

• Artist: Lijah_Scottech
• Description: Written about a year ago, I really have no idea why I wrote it. I was just bored and depressed, that's usually when I'll write. So hope you guys like it.
• Date: 11/27/2008
• Tags: raven black girl dead

Raven black bleeds saline,

About to watch her first death,

She is the only,

Left abandoned by the others,

Watch as the blood flows,

Call out; no one listens,

Sit; watch silently,

Apathetic to the scene; not possible,

But she feels no empathy,

Feathers dyed black,

Heart died orange,

Fly to nest,

Alone again,

She bleeds saline,

Pillow to breath,

Suffocate to sleep

Comments

[Specificity]

Ah, finally a complete and unique poem. I like it. But It does seem like your only stating facts. After each sentence, maybe describe further into it.