• My head spins and my thoughts race
    Thinking about all the things in life I can’t face.
    Pondering how I’m going to get through it all,
    Trying to figure out exactly when I’ll fall.

    It’s all there, a kaleidoscope in my head,
    The light and the dark, rebuttals to what might be said
    Death and life, comingling into one
    Wondering how I kept living but stopped having fun

    I remember and rethink, oh the mistakes I’ve made
    How I’ve let all my good times fade.
    I let all the bad impede, what a stupid choice
    For now, all the joy in my life- it has no voice.

    The spinning stops and my cloud of doubt evaporates
    As I suddenly realize all the horrible thoughts, so easy to sate.
    I’ve lost my loves and my friends
    But that doesn’t mean it all has to come to an end

    Out of the misery some joy sparked
    And on a new journey me, myself, and I embarked
    The weight on my shoulders? The doubt in my mind?
    Of course it still resides, but now I’m not blind.

    I realize now it’s too important to waste
    When all that I’ve lost would want me to continue on, in haste
    The trials, the worries of course will come
    But I’ve too much to lose to give up anymore than some

    I thought it was gone, all that was to lose- then I took a look around
    And was amazed at what I found.
    There they were, the encouraging smiles
    So I think I’ll be okay to continue on, at least for a while.