• Pain
    Overwhelming,
    sudden.
    Old wounds
    that I thought were healed
    split open
    gushing worse than before.
    I thought it was over
    thought I had accepted it
    thought that
    because I buried it in the back of my mind
    I was healed.
    Thought that, at least,
    the pain would lessen over time.
    I was wrong.
    I'll never be free.
    Random phrases
    Unspecific triggers
    set fire to ashes
    that I thought burned out long ago.
    Each time I'm reminded
    it's worse.
    The first was like a gunshot.
    Pain like a hole in my chest.
    Took a while to heal,
    but it missed all the vital organs and bones.
    The second was like an explosion.
    Knocked me down,
    took parts of me with it
    when the pain and suffering finally faded.
    Took a while to rebuild myself.
    This time was indescribable.
    Akin to the pain of a shark's feeding frenzy,
    with all the suffering
    and almost irreversible damage
    of the most poisonous animal imaginable.
    I fear the next will be the worst
    like a nuclear bomb
    tearing up my body.
    Leaving me unable to heal for months
    and irreversibly mutating my cells
    so that I will never be free.