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Alright, i'm sure we've all heard of this game even if the name doesn't ring a bell. For example, would you rather be rich and ugly or beaufitul and dummer than dirt? However, the focus of the question that's been festering my mind has nothing to do with blonde stereotypes. ( I myself am blonde and in answer to the question above: i would rather be smart, make lots of money, and then get plastic surgery)
But anywho, my question is something on less of a vain, shallow approach and rather deep sentiment. In a RELATIONSHIP, would you rather be needed...or wanted?
Let me explain. We've all seen those couples that are gushing out their feelings and undying love saying, 'i could never live without you!' now, whether you take this into a purely romanticly fantasized way (such as Romeo and Juliet [who literally couldn't live without eachother even though they'd only known eachother for about a week]) or the comical sense which is portrayed time and time again on modern day shows where a clumsy guy somehow happends to land an amazing girl and he depends on her for everything and yet she never leaves him.
but i'm more talking about the 'litterally' couldn't live without you. i mean, i've heard of those couples that have been married for 50 years, one dies, and very shortly after the other one does, too. Are you the type of person who likes to be relied on? Do you like to feel like you're needed and that only you can provide certain comforts to make another person happy? Are you the type that gets very emotional after a breakup?
Or maybe you're not any of those things, but you'd still rather be needed. maybe you just feel like you've been sorta wandering around with nothing to ground you, and when you meet that special someone, he/she keeps you from going off the edge because you see that someone is depending on you to be their support.
Now, for the devil's advocate. Being wanted is a tricky balancing act. Especially if you want too much, then you could wind up with a restraining order. but, that's not really the kind of want i'm talking about. I think it can be intoxicatingly romantic when a person just wants for someone else. not in a sexual way or anything, you perverts. but hear me out.
Humans naturally tend to want. want is a selfish thing, quite unique to our species. It's not something we need in order to survive, but rather, preferences.
...this might come across as really wierd, but i'll try to explain.
When someone needs someone else, it is more based on animal insticnt. when we're born, we need our parents to care for us, we need shelter, and some of us even need to be loved. But want is purely human.
I want someone to look at me, not as something needed for survival, but for more of a selfish...contentment. if that makes any sense. i don't want to be needed, i want to be wanted.
*ugh* this is really difficult to put this feeling into words. ok, when someone is wanted, it goes above human insticnt, as opposed to procreation. I see it to the point where...here, let me play this out,
"I don't need you in my life,"
"I don't need you in my life, either."
"...but i want you there,"
i want to be around simply because i make someone happy. he wants to spend time with me. not because he needs to, but because he prefers it.
That still sounds really wierd, but to those that could follow, bravo. this has got to be one of the worst entries, i've written, but i still like the concept. whoever reads this should post if you'd rather be needed or wanted. or if you have some cool 'would you rathers'. dont' be shy, i wont bite you. ...unless you're cake.
 Qua Quidam · Sun Mar 09, 2008 @ 11:23pm · 8 Comments |
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