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I've been thinking about this girl for sometime now. Trying to get close to her is such a burden. I don't know what I'm doing and I just feel as if I should never talk to her again. Reason why is because I was fed up with holding my feelings inside about her and I just wrote them out and gave them to her. I couldn't take it anymore. It was becoming a bother to me and I just needed relief.

I gave it to her today in 1st period. As the period went on I just got lower and lower. At the end of the period I didn't walk her to her next class, I just left the school as I normally would. A bitter taste it left in my mouth. Walking down the street from the school I started to shout in my head, "Stupid, stupid, stupid! Why did you give her that? WHY!"

I soon remembered she invited me to her recital on Sunday and now I just feel worse. Since its going to be highly awkward since I'm pretty sure she doesn't feel the way I do. This isn't making anything better, just worse. I don't know how she's going to take it or what she's going to do. I doubt I'll be uninvited to the recital, but it'll just be different. I don't know what I've just done... was it the right thing?