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Who knows.

She values school over everything else. She has it on a pedestal, as if going to college is suddenly going to solve all of life problems, instead of creating more. Ah well, she'll realize when she's in school, that it's not a magic solution to fix everything, it's just a doorway into a whole nother world of problems and bullshit.

It'll be great to not have to work min. wage. I'm not saying I want to work min. wage the rest of my life. I know the value of a college education.. but I also know that it's not the biggest thing in my life. It's nowhere near priority.

It's fine, I really don't care though. I have been enjoying every moment I have with her, and I'll enjoy all the future moments I have, because I know that nothing can last forever. It just happens. I learned a long time ago to not be sad, to not dwell on the misery, to just accept the pockets of happiness when you get them, and be glad for them. Enjoy the memories, in the end, they're all we ever have.

She's not looking for happiness, she's looking for a solution. I'm living for happiness, and so I naturally assume that we'll part our ways at some point. Education? Fine, pursue it to your hearts content. I can't say she's wrong, in the path she's taking. It's not wrong, it's just not the path I'd choose, and that's what makes us different.

At the end of the day, I knew I'd be alone. Self fulfilling prophecy? Maybe. Fate? Possibly. All in my head? Sure, but don't let them hear you say that, or they'll think we're all crazy, ahahaha~

I just wanted to write this so I can reflect. It's a way of "leaving my sadness behind me" I suppose.. I get it all out, so I don't dwell on it.

I'll still be moving to San Antonio at some point, with or without her.. I'd prefer with, but if it can't be helped, then it can't be helped. I got to experience a lot of new things these past two years, and I'm glad for them. I know I'm strong enough to stand alone, but I enjoy the company of others. I know how it'll all end, and.. I don't care, lol.

At the end of the day, I just don't care anymore.