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twenty bucks says you won't say a word to me tomorrow
unless i say something to you first,

because that's just who you are, right?
seldom to be the one to extend the reach of love and affection

even when you know you could never receive rejection.

all i can do is carry on and do my best to realize
that we are on a continuos loop,

and right now our loop is on a shitty part that we've both endured before

isn't that the definition of insanity?
doing the same thing over and over again.

you constantly break my heart in the worst ways,
and even now when i say that i know its not completely true.

i break my heart at the idea and thoughts of you,
and why do i continue to put you on some pedestal that you will never be able to rise to?

you are truly an amazing person, i mean that

but its always been me fighting for this friendship, always.

don't get me wrong, you've fought a few times when my priorities were out of whack,
but when they were fine, when they were aligned properly, it was always me seeking you.

and i don't mean to sound childish, but i cannot continue to do that.
the constant feeling of rejection is too much for my heart to bear.

eight years in, have i ever made you feel so alone?
i'm sorry for any of the days you worried or wondered about me.

"This s**t is everything to me, this s**t is everything
Don't know where we stand, I used to hit you 'bout everything
Are we still good? Are we still good?
Are we still good? Are we still good?
If I need to talk are you around?
Are you down for the cause?"