• What's that, what's that i heard you say?
    A glorious winter holiday?!
    A white trimmed hat upon your head
    Wrapping presents, green and red
    Although I'm feeling quite deterred
    At the thought of an uninvited visitor

    This man called Santa comes down my chimney
    He's fat, he's old
    Oh god, who is he??
    Flying round the world just to see a child
    He could just be a *****!!

    A ridiculous holiday, the way i see
    Putting gifts under a a pine tree
    I could really do without
    Something green and prickly
    Inside my house

    How surprisingly, i never did know
    About the dreaded mistletoe
    As if people need another excuse
    For forceful affection, domestic abuse


    But complain and puzzle as I might
    I suppose that x-mas is alright.