• I considered these cities more than once, all for the two different guys that lived within them.

    Magem, the town I knew so well, seeing as I was raised here since birth. The friends I had come to know here, the memories, they all sparked a flame of passion for my future.

    Bahing, the cluttered, clustered city, one that always left me with curiosity as I had no memories there, so the future was always expected of me, for it to be holding a promise, a promise to be a surprising future.

    Jared.

    And Ethan too.

    Being in the awfully sad and perplexed state I was in, I was allowed to face the truth. I knew now who it was I loved and that I loved him no matter what, even if at this period of time, he was with another girl. The fact that I had such strong feelings for him, during my big misunderstanding told me that. Now that I knew, I didn't want to leave him.

    I took in some comfort as I grasped for as much of Jared's shirt that I possibly could, letting out a body racking sigh that started the shivers over again. My head was tucked into the slender shoulder that offered warmth as I contemplated the actions that had just happened between us. With each passing minute, I felt like letting his body surround me like a cage, so I'd never have to face the world again.

    I was so disappointed with myself, carrying this weight on my shoulders, I had came to him, ready to discuss my feelings, I made it to the threshold of his room, before I had an earth breaking urge to cry again, so I turned to take my leave.

    Then bed creaked, and I was ashamed of myself, all because I broke down at the innocence of his question.

    "Koum," He had asked, "Are you alright?" Such plain words, but the gentleness of his voice, shook my mental state to no end. It was all I could do to reply a feeble, "No..."

    And my body, just like my voice, shook too, all when he took his step foward, and placed a hand on my shoulder. I struggled to keep my gate upright, and make my leave graceful. But no, it was all over. One step and I stumbled.

    Then, I collapsed.

    Sinking to the floor, I had found his bedroom wall to lean against for support. He followed the weeping mess of stressed, puffy-eyed, idiotically hare-brained, girl to the floor.

    "Koumeiseidai," Jared had wrapped his slender, tan body around me in a hug as I sobbed to myself.

    Your chance to get closer to Ethan was blown...

    I had screamed loudly at the rashness of my own mind, fearful like a little child. It scared Jared, and I cried harder, embarrassed.

    I wished he didn't flinch away from me when I did scream. He probably thought I was a little child again, that I wasn't mature, too young again, just a kid. I didn't like that at the terms of love.

    You're not good enough for him either...

    I had screamed louder through Jared's shoulder. The thin fabric of his shirt did nothing to muffle me.

    "Shh, Koumeiseidai, it’s okay. You can let it out." He spoke quietly rocking us back and forth in his lap. The carpet was rough against my legs and I was feeling nauseated.

    So now, I sat here sniffling, my face pressed at his neck, well aware that I could be hurting his ears by pulling back snot so loudly at them. His arms were so nice, laying against my back, his fingers rubbing along my spine in a caring gesture.

    "J-Jared I," I stuttered at him. "I don't have to worry anymore. Not about leaving my family, not about leaving you- my friends I mean." I changed that last part of my sentence. His fingers had stopped massaging my backside for just a moment, before starting again.

    "So you mean, you're not going to that special elite school?"

    "No, I didn't get accepted." I sniffled loudly and he hugged me again.

    "I'm so sorry Koum, it'll be alright you-" Jared began, before he was interupted by the yelling.

    "WHAT, WHAT WAS WITH THE SCREAMING?" Spade, Jared and Sion's cousin burst into the room, throwing the door open so hard I was sure it left a dent on the wall.

    "ANASTASIA TOLD ME SHE HEARD SCREAMING NEXT DOOR," He looked down to view us, explaining Anastasia's crazy claims that we could be doing something not meant for us. How their female cousin could mistake those screams for anything but mournful I did not know.

    "Oh," Spade's posture reverted back to sloppy and relaxed. "So I came in here before you two decided to make babies. Phew." Spade sighed happily. Even if Spade was quite cute, and millions of years older than me, I did think this twenty year-old could possibly be on the slow side- even though I do know it is all just his true self.

    And for that reason, I chuckled, unable to stop the bubbling fit of giggles. I let a hand slide off of Jared to wipe a tear from my eye. Spade seemed content that we weren't going to do anything and left the room laughing rather loudly, letting his- "AHAHAHA! AHA HA! .... Ha..." echo throughout the house.

    "Ah, that was nice." I let my other hand fall away from Jared and stood up again sniffling.

    "I wish I could have done that for you." Jared stared at me, his eyes indifferent. "You sound so much better."

    "Thanks," My cheeks began to burn as I heard my screams throughout the back of my head. I flicked my nails back and forth over each other nervously. Did he know how loving he sounded when those words were spoken? I thought I could just sink back into the floor, have my knees and feet turn into jelly. I walked to the entryway of his room, making a good way out, enough to see Spade drawn out on the couch watching the comedy channel.

    "I'm kind of happy you're staying, you know?"