We all seek to live our lives as perfectly as possible. In the beginning, every second is precious. Not a single moment can be wasted. We frantically look over everything we’ve done in hopes that it meant something, that it helped us achieve a higher purpose. But as we move forward in years, our conviction wavers. We get caught in the flow, and we forget those dreams that were once so precious. The small things that were once a matter of wasted life or meaningless death are now so trivial that we forget them in the sea of memories that have shaped us. These convictions, however, remain with us. Although they are washed away in the tide, they still remain, afloat, and rest on your conscience. Not a single one is that noticeable, but together their crushing weight pushes on our minds, a constant pressure that cannot be thrown aside. And this, this… is the source of most people’s unhappiness.
But I have been able to quell the storm in my mind. My unhappiness was caused by many of the reasons I mentioned: forgotten dreams, wasted memories, and a path that I lost sight of until this moment. For much of my life I had a deep-seated sadness, a melancholy about life. For a while, I thought I had thrown it away. Now I understand the truth. I had never lost sight of the path. I just hadn’t realized it was there until it disappeared from beneath my feet.
The equation for happiness seems to be a complex one. It is fraught with complications, or so people believe. A certain level of comfort is necessary, and certain level of satisfaction needs to be obtained. You need a certain number or people, and you need that number to accept you. You need a certain level of education, to reach a certain level of understanding. You need a certain purpose, and you need to fulfill that purpose when you find it. Add all these numbers and values up, and you have your happiness. Or not.
I have shunned this belief in place of a simpler, more effective one. Life isn’t about doing everything. Happiness isn’t about doing everything right. Rather, the secret to life and happiness is… just one thing. Let me explain: If you live your life for one sole purpose, and put the entirety of your being into that purpose, you will die happy. Even if you don’t succeed at that purpose, you can find solace in the fact that you tried your very hardest.
Now I didn’t write this story to tell you of my own life philosophy. For all you know, I’m just a doddering old fool scribbling his every thought on to a napkin. Rather, I’m here to tell you about the reason I lived. As a last testament to everything I’ve endured, I will tell you the path I unknowingly took. It was a path carved out by a woman who is lost to me now, taken by the loving embrace of Death. And soon I am about to cross that threshold, to follow her beyond life.
- Title: Rachel's Story
- Artist: Slinkenhofer
The Intro to a Novelette I'm attempting to write for a friend. It starts out in truth of events as they happened, and stems off into the future. As with my last entry, it's from the perspective of a dying man, looking back at his life.
It starts out kind of shitty, but it will pick up the pace.
I'll post each section as I finish them;give me some feedback as to what I should change, things you like, etc.
- Date: 11/07/2011
- Tags: rachels story
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