• I Wanted To Kill Religion, So I Prayed To Find A Gun

    She put her knees on the floor
    Her fingertips to her nose
    Her eyes spilling faithlessness
    And uttered a strange cry meant to implore
    Someone she had never felt before
    In a way that made her feel dirty and shameful
    But when push comes to shove
    She looks for a way to change
    So today, she prayed

    “Today I woke up looking for hope
    But found nothing in this waste of space inside myself
    And nothing in these people, these things,
    Treasures that mean nothing on a day like this
    So I bounded my hands in a shriveled attempt
    To open my eyes, to see where I’m blind
    I thought maybe this could give me something
    To keep a hope in, like a butterfly net
    But the holes
    There are holes in hope’s damn door
    And I find myself feeling jaded
    For hoping that there would ever be more
    Beyond a world like this.”

    So she cried and she cried
    Feeling betrayed, exhausted
    Wondering how people pull their answers
    From a candy-painted sky
    How nice it would be if they’d care to explain it
    Bones of faith built up on utter lies
    So she closed her eyes
    Swollen and shaken
    Understanding and empathizing with the masses
    Who were able to lie better to themselves
    Than she was

    “The truth is an ugly thing,” she whispered
    “It’s an ugly thing when embraced
    Unlike the pretty lies we fancy
    Tucked underneath our fervor dreams
    But when the two are face to face
    It’s a difficult thing to explain
    Like seeing yourself inside two mirrors
    Where they once were solid
    And now only the cracks remain.”