• Why is it I that always get's it?
    A cruel joke by those 'meaning well?'
    A sham to drag me out of nesting?
    To get away I hid myself in the darkness, all alone
    The last refuge
    But even it couldn't shield me
    I was tormented, i died inside
    Why aren't I the one that everyone wants to know?
    I have a good life, good parents, great stuff
    But in truth, they are material & cannot satisfy me
    I beg for friends, love & a life
    But until then i hide away, no-one can see me here
    Though I can't hide here in the darkness forever
    I lust to come out & become social
    I just can't go out & face society though
    I have scars from my last battle with it
    Not physical but mental scars, pressed deep into my head
    The constant battle in which I took part
    The pain that I felt, real pain
    Not the pain of losing a lover to another
    The pain was real, it still hurts me years later
    It isn't the injury I could face that scares me
    But more the reality of it
    If anyone is out there, I beg for help
    A call that is ignored, like little kids ignore a danger sign
    It is there, but isn't looked at, merely thrown to one side
    I am left aloe in a cavern of sorrow, a cave of self pity
    My mere voice calls out for help
    & it echoes, why me? why me?