I'm a horrible friend, no one ever trusts me with anything too personal, I get lied to WAY TOO MUCH, I have trust issues, I feel sick to my stomach, I'm ridiculously stupid for how easily I fall for people, I feel betrayed and alone, I am only a back-up, I doubt people actually think of me as a good person, The only thing I am kinda good at is school and I am an AVERAGE student, if being used is a talent I'm the best at that, No one ever really knows me because I have TRUST ISSUES and I can't tell anyone anything, My love life SUCKS(I always fall for the ones who would rather jump off a cliff then be with me), any relationship that I have had in the past doesn't really count as a relationship because I was either being used to get closer to someone else or I didn't even feel like I really wanted to be in that relationship(because it wasn't true to me feeling wise), I have lied to myself to make me feel better, I can't even take my own advice, I am a procrastinator, I never do what I should, I'm just a venting post(because apparently I'm really good for that), People say that I am a good listener, but I doubt they really feel that way, My writing sucks, my photography sucks, I can't draw very well at all, I am a hopeless romantic with extra HOPELESS.
I could go on with things I know are wrong with me. I'm just waiting for someone to tell me to either stop pitying myself or that I am not any of those things when I know I'm probably just being lied to again. My first boyfriend loves my best friend and only used me to get closer to her(and it isn't her fault! So she better not think so) and my third boyfriend claimed he loved me more than once only to randomly leave me for one of my best friends and claim that she is the best thing that ever happened to him(even though they don't date anymore). My friends are leaving me one by one and I don't feel like I can tell my family anything. And no one will probably care to read any of this. I don't even feel better doing it. I will probably end up deleting it.
View User's Journal
|
|||||||||||||||
|
|||||||||||||||
|
|||||||||||||||
|
[i:c91fd492be]
And I don't feel the need to go on
I was happier singing along the way
I had things, I need to say
But now it's like a swallowed tape
That holds up my face from inside
[/size:c91fd492be][/i:c91fd492be][/align:c91fd492be][/color:c91fd492be]
And I don't feel the need to go on
I was happier singing along the way
I had things, I need to say
But now it's like a swallowed tape
That holds up my face from inside
[/size:c91fd492be][/i:c91fd492be][/align:c91fd492be][/color:c91fd492be]