Written at the WFC Guild But... even tho i've been away a long time from there... and tho i disagree with how people act there... I am finding that in my heart i still love them. well.. i guess in my heart i'm in love with the congregation i joined.. but they have changed a lot and really quite aren't that group anymore. many have left, the great pastor there passed on to be with the Lord.. and it's now a contest of just how elitest you are there...
At one time, that church had a great calling.. but i fear they are losing it through their own foolishness and fumbling. I think they could still do it.. but their heart as a group isn't what it used to be.... still... lately my thoughts keep returning to them. and i feel this love in my heart reawakening.. and it's been such a very long time.. but i am wondering if Jesus is preparing me to go back there... and trying to make a change in people.. with whoever will listen to me... probably noone would... but i can try. and when i talk about my old pastor, I do feel this feeling of such forgiveness for them all.. such as i've never really known until now. I've always said i forgave them.. but only now am i starting to really feel it... and i realize my anger passed away... and Jesus has been healing my heart towards going to church. I credit a lot of that healing towards my association with several christian guilds here. My activity in them and fellowship has encouraged my heart.. and my soul starts to think now and again of people i used to know...
I would say regarding the thread topic that I wouldn't want to really join another denomination.. I have thought about it.. but I really enjoyed the worship services at my old church. I really did a lot. And, while i don't adhere to those strict holiness standards anymore; I can look back and see where when i did live in them as a new christian, how they helped me focus and be consecrated. And, I do agree with them for the most part. My only disagreement is that I don't think Jesus is going to send people to hell for not adhering to their standards. Because say if you were to adhere to it just because you were brought up in it and not because of a conviction, to Christ, that action is pretty empty. Therefore, that action is just a waste of time. and.. having both done it and left living those standards... I can see the ways the Lord has been in my life in both ways. I think some people do need them. But, if you always need those structures to help you grow in the Lord, chances are your growth is malformed. You'll never grow up in Jesus if you always need to rely on strict consecration. Likewise, without a strict consecration at some point, I don't feel people get rooted into him properly either. To me it's all like growing up... when we are children, we have set bed times.. what we can watch.. what we can wear.. who our parents let us associate with.. then, as we grow up, those guidelines change and continue to as we grow. They are like a wardrobe for our spirits which changes and conforms to us as our flesh wears different clothes and what fits also changes. ^_^
These things have really been in my mind lately.... I will continue to stew on them as the spirit puts it in me..
 Graceangel · Fri Nov 12, 2004 @ 09:40pm · 0 Comments |
