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ANTI-CYBER 3 (BLESS ME LITTLE HOBBIT FEET)

Tis another addition of the ANTI-CYBER!!! I know that many of you have been enjoying my Anti-Cyber blogs so I've gotten to business on them. Enjoy

It was coincidentally the right after my encounter with the Zombie Cyber that I stumbled upon yet another wanting to Cyber. She was dressed up as an elf; in her profile all you saw were elf porn, elf chibi, elf art, elf this, elf that! TO MANY ELFS!!! To be frank, she was obsessed with elfs... to a point that it might just be a clinical problem.

I felt good about this one. She was defiantly an "EZ" target and I was going to have fun… but I didn't know exactly how much fun I was going to have. This is the story.

I was this time however going to try a different approach than usual and just make it a quite awkward situation instead. Who knows what would come of this, it was a new method and I didn't know what to expect.

I sent her a PM concerning the request for a RP Cyber… it started.

Aeron: Hey! You were the one looking for a RP Cyber right?

Crazy Elf Chick: YESH!!! That was me!!! =D

For obvious reasons we are going to call this subject the "Crazy Elf Chick"… Moving on.

Aeron: Fun =D you pick first.

This would give me the upper hand if she picked first, but for some reason… I already knew what she was going to be.

Carzy Elf Chick: OK! I am a light skinned elf with long pink hair with leaves in it. My breasts are enormous and my nipples are hard. I have smooth skin to the touch and have nothing on. My light blue glowing eyes are like the moon and I have lips like spring.

I am sort of impressed by this prolonged description but none-the-less; I take advantage of the situation. Seeing as to how she was very literate I decided I should do the

Aeron: OK! I am a Caucasian Hobbit with brown curly hair. I wear tattered cloth shorts with a tattered cloth shirt. I carry a large luggage on my back and wear no shoes; this shows my furry curls on my leathery feet. I carry a cane of oak and have a small smoking pipe in my hand.

This description makes me happy all over… BTW I have just finished reading the hobbit so this really makes me happy.

Crazy Elf Chick: Mmm… I like me some hobbit ;o Do you want to start?

It's like I had to put no effort into this at all! But I best not disturb the delicacy of such a good opportunity, I must remember too keep her as long as possible.

Aeron: Sure.
It was the end of winter and spring had already started and was well on it's way to summer. The little hobbit by the name of d***o Gaggins was searching for a new home. He had been out of luck for the past months and was in dire need of rest. Maybe his luck would change today as he walked through the forest.

Crazy Elf Chick: Dancing nude among the trees she notices a presence enter her forest. It is a hobbit that has enter, he seems to be searching for something. She jumps down from the trees and Introduces herself. "Hi, there! My names Pink! Can I help you?" She looked up and down at the tired hobbit.

Funny that her name should be Pink… *cough*

Aeron: The hobbit looked up to find in surprise a nude elf in his presence. He was delighted with joy! "Hello fair elf! Me name be d***o, d***o Gaggins!" He looked her up and down and noticed her unnaturally large chest. He could not keep his eyes off of those rolling hills of the shire.

Greatest… name… ever…

Crazy Elf Chick: She replies to him happily "Well nice to meet you!" She bends over putting her large breasts right in his face reaching her arm out for a handshake.

I know this is just a cyber, but please, just imagine how righteous that would be for a heavy chested elf chick, completely nude, too bend over too shake your hand… [Holy Music Plays]

Aeron: Still staring at her breasts, he reaches his arm out to meet hers. He stares at them as they jiggle when they shake each other's hand. "Nice meeting you too." He said still hypnotized by her enormous chest.

Crazy Elf Chick: "I see you got a look at these" She says as plays with her breast and squishes them together. "I'm used to it. I think of them as an asset anyways! Stare all you like mister d***o!" She said smiling. "So what brings you to my domain?"

Once again… imagine… and enjoy…

Aeron: Takes a gulp "Well you see… miss… miss pink, I come her in search of accommodations for myself so that I make give me little hobbit feet a break. They are most tired." He said now looking at her face and then switching back to her "Bubbles".

For those who do not know the story, a long time ago my father and me were driving in the Stang (slang for a Mustang). We had oddly enough gotten into a conversation of the arousal of the female n****e. Considering I was only 14 at the time this was ballin, and I enjoyed that my father gave such mature recognition towards me.

He soon brought up a memory with him and his sister. He told me that a girl, who's name I cannot remember, had driven them home quite often. This young woman was beautiful and quite blonde in many ways. He and his sister would always pick on her and mess with her because she was so blonde.

Not the brightest bunch blonde people. Many of them lack in one thing (The Brain), but gain in others (body, shape, beauty, and breasts). Blondes have been known to have the largest breasts; this young woman was no exception.

One day she was blowing bubbles with my father and his sister when she spilt almost a whole carton of bubble juice all over herself… including her two moons.

I guess she just didn't think in their innocence that my aunt and my dad would get any ideas about taking advantage of the situation. I think this because he then told me that she let them blow bubbles off her chest. I looked at him think… you lucky b*****d.

He was tripping and so was I. That Probably the most fun my dad and me had. He concluded with "And so we gave her the nick name "Bubbles", not for the incident, but for the fact that they were huge! We even made a theme song for her, but we kept it secret."

He then cleared his throat and began to sing, "B, U, B, B, L, E, S! What is that upon your chest? BUBBLES!!!" We had a good laugh and our day went on as usual, it was as though we hadn't ever bonded.

Now if you remembered, we last left off with me and my little hobbit mouth saying I needed a place to stay and then staring back at the elf chicks giant hooters.

Also, after I had made a nickname for her "Girls", I constantly used different words for her "Weather Balloons" among other things. She kind of caught .. awhile and began to do the same.

Crazy Elf Chick: She giggled at d***o's mindless stare. "Well your welcome to stay with me! Come on I'll show you my place!" She said motioning him to follow.

Here goes nothing! (WEWT!!!)

Aeron: Before she could turn, the little hobbit had jumped right in between her "Fun Bags" and started to make himself right at home. "Bless me little hobbit feet, this will do just fine!" His words echoed as he said them once he was in. He started to unpack, it was almost teatime and he wanted too have everything read by then. He was even thinking of inviting his neighbor above him.

Yah for me!!!

Crazy Elf Chick: She felt somewhat shocked by his actions, but she didn't mind, at least she had company. She looked down "Well then Mister d***o lets head to my little enchanted patch!"

Aeron: Looked up between her "Swampers" and replied "Tea is almost ready so hurry if you will." It echoed when he said it. He was setting the table and the hot water was on the stove.

Crazy Elf Chick: "OK Mister Gaggins!" she said with a smile, "Here we are!" It was a nice patch. It was covered in clovers and glowed with a single ray of light from an opening in the trees above. It gleams with queer glowing lights of green appearing noncyclically.

Aeron: Steam arose from her "Knockers". "Tea is ready!" It echoed as he said it.

Crazy Elf Chick: She smiled, she loved tea very much and was fond of those who mastered it's brewing. "Please put 6 cubes in mine." She said with excitement.

If only every girl was turned on by making tea… Chr-ist…

Aeron: "Of course Miss Pink!" It once again echoed when he spoke. He looked all around in the cabinets and jars but he could not find any sugar. "Well scratch me little hobbit head, I seem to be out of sugar! Maybe Miss Pink has some…" He popped his head out of Pink's "Memory Glands" and asked her most kindly, "Excuse me Miss Pink, but do you think I could get some sugar?"

Brace yourself… cause it's coming full speed… and its not stopping…

Crazy Elf Chick: She was flabbergasted by his comment but decided to render herself to him. Her eyes sparkled as she leaned into him and began to slip her tongue into his mouth. She was getting hard from this and embraces Mister Gaggins even more.

Aeron: Shock by the reply to his comment, he muffled in between her "Ta Ta's", "OH MY!!! BLESS ME LITTLE HOBBIT EYES, YOU BE BENDING IT!!!" His words were however wasted for she could not hear him.

Crazy Elf Chick: She picked him up with one hand, "Lets see if your name fits ;o." She held him tight and used him as his name directed. "oooOOOoooh…" She moaned with pleasure.

Wait… You put me where!?!?!?

Aeron: As he was fulfilling his name he nearly drowned in her "Enchanted Bush". He said gargling, "Bless me little hobbit lungs *Gargle* *Gargle* Stop this! *Gargle* *Gargle* Stop now!" He prayed that he could be heard, but it seemed futile.

Crazy Elf Chick: Hearing a muffle, she pulled him out of her "Woodland Cave" and noticed his gasping for air. "Oh gosh I'm so sorry!!! See I thought when you said sugar, you wanted me to ******** your brains out!" She said with a straight face.

Aeron: "Not at all, but even is so I am a tad to small." He gasped for air "Bless me little hobbit pants, what do you think I am, a Leprechaun!? Does it look like I got a furry red beard!? Do I have a rainbow and a pot of gold anywhere in sight!? I don't got no magic!!! I'm just a little hobbit!!! You can't just go shoving me into your "Hobbit Hole" like that!!!" He was somewhat embarrassed and flustered at the same time.

If you didn't catch the Leprechaun part, well then let me explain.

I once read an adult joke where this busty blonde waitress finds a Leprechaun at her bar. She looks at him and tells him she wants a pot of gold. The Leprechaun looks her up and down examining her and tells her that she has three wishes.

The blonde thinks as hard as she can and comes up with an answer, "I wish that every man in this bar would notice me!" The Leprechaun raises his hand and snaps his fingers. The blonde's clothes immediately disappear and every man in there notices her. Though done in an odd manner the blonde is satisfied and ponders her second wish.

The Leprechaun asks "What be your second wish?" The blonde thinks as hard as she could and came up wish her next wish; "I wish I had a man in my life!" The Leprechaun raises his hand and snaps his finger, the next thing you know, and the Leprechaun had a big d**k and is balling the blondes face.

The blonde was not satisfied by this wish and used her third to fix this "I didn't mean any man, I meant an attractive man!" The Leprechaun raised his hand and snapped his fingers and at once he was an attractive man and was screwing the blonde.

An old man next to them had a waiter come up to him, the waiter asked, "What'll ya have?" The old man looked at the couple doing it on the bar floor and looked back at the waiter and said "I'll have what he's having!"

Anyways… moving on.

Crazy Elf Chick: She stared at him for a second... looked at his little "Tent"… she stared for a second and then pointed her finger. A spark flew from it and onto his little pants. Immediately the "tent" grew and grew, it grew to a quite nice size, for her at least, and she looked at him, "How about now Mister d***o Gaggins?" She smirked at him.

If only male enhancement were so easy…

Aeron: Now looking at his large "Second Hobbit" he crossed his arms, "Bless me little hobbit legs! What am I supposed to do with this oversized "Kick Stand", how do you expect me to walk with this!? I'll be pole-vaulting everywhere I go now!!!" He was now angry but at the same time please as any man in the right mind would be for such a blessing.

Crazy Elf Chick: "Oh shut it d***o and let me be to my Gaggin!" She grabbed the large "Bottle Of Hobbit Juice" and stuck it in her "Spring Break" and begun to pleasure it up and down.

If you didn't get the "Spring Break" one, don't feel stupid, it took me awhile to figure it out when I read over it again and remembered she compared her lips to spring. In other words she was giving head to a living d***o.

Aeron: Being slung around by the back and forth pleasure on his "Hobbit Joy Stick" made him dizzy and somewhat sick. "Oh goodness… Bless me little hobbit stomach…" He was not happy at all by this abuse.

At this point I am getting tired of this uber long cyber and want it to end… I was going to have to end this soon.

Crazy Elf Chick: She finished by licking what was left of the "Hobbit Juice" from his "Hobbit Bottle" and looked at him, "Be my d***o d***o Gaggin!" She was running him down her body, closer and closer to her "All Natural Buffet".

I am tired of this… real tired of this… I am literally tired… ATM, I do not want to be in Pink's "Pink" … I needed to end this…

Aeron: The swinging and jolting around did not settle well with his little hobbit stomach… Mr. Gaggins was going gag… hard… "Bless me little hobbi—BLEEH!!!" Mr. Gaggins teatime went all over… Pink's "Pink".

Was it victory? We'll let you be the judge.

Crazy Elf Chick: Feels her self become wet, "What on… I haven't even started!?" She looked down and noticed Mister Gaggins had gotten sick all over her Elvin "Vajayjay". "WHAT THE ******** DID YOU JUST DO ON ME!?!?!?" She glared at the little hobbit in anger.

I would've expected her to get pissed and leave… but… this didn't happen. Imediately.

Aeron: "Bless me little hobbit ears! Don't yell! It couldn't be helped Miss Pink!" He now glared back at her with the same caliber. "You were much to rough, and bless me little hobbit a** I didn't s**t myself from your violent shakin!"

I had just broken her. She was getting out of character.

Crazy Elf Chick: Ok wait a second I thought you wanted to cyber? Isn't that what we were doing? Why did you ******** spew on me?

I was not about to quit now.

Aeron: Mr. Gaggins looked up at the elf with the most dumbfounded look, "What you be talking bout? What all is this thing by the term O' "cyber"?" He was utterly confused.

Crazy Elf Chick: Ok stop it… I am serious! Why are you acting like this? I just wanted to have some fun! You're being ignorant!

Aeron: He stared at the stranger with confusion, "You be not no elf! What sorcery you be playing at! I'll give ya the Ol' one-two!" He was now ready for a fight!

Crazy Elf Chick: Ok I'll play along.
She looked at the silly little hobbit, he was amusing "And what do you plan on doing to me huh?"

At the time that I wrote this next part I had just gotten solid snake on Super Smash Brothers Brawl™ and was feeling… "snakey" (that was meant to be a pun of sneaky)

Aeron: "Well me little b***h… It's time to kick a** and chew bubble gum… and I'm all out of gum…" The little hobbit pulled out his handy dandy M136 AT4 LAW and pulled it over his shoulder.

Crazy Elf Chick: What the ******** is a M136 AT4 LAW?

Aeron: He steadied himself for the shot… he only had one… "Astalavista… b***h!" He first… the explosion of the Anti-Tank Weapon was devastating… the whole forest went up and flames as the targets wrangled parts flew everywhere... "Mission Accomplished."

Crazy Elf Chick: OK ******** this…
I enjoyed the part when I pulled out my M136 AT4 LAW and blew her a** up… it was fun and I was happy to see that b***h fly.

So that's my story, hope this edition didn't fail to please ma fans. Peace!

More to come…