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Damn, I made another mistake. Soon after I became a member of Gaia I met a girl. We became close friends and started going out. But after a while she stopped logging in. I thought she was gone and wasnt going to come back...
In a couple months later I met another girl. She reminded me of myself in a few ways, and she became my girlfriend.
But like the my girl Michelle (in real life) we werent able to chat with each other that much. I had a feeling that would happen since we werent going to be able to see each other once the summer ended. I've only talked to her about 7 times and seen her once (but didnt get to talk to her) since then.
Like Michelle, I dont get to chat with my second gf very often. Also, Michelle finally called me last Thursday, I didn't expect it. And now my first gf is back.
I can't avoid this, I need to strait'n things out. My father as tells me time and time again to always respect women, and that phrase alone told me alot (enough atleast). I get irritated when I hear someone saying how they are cheating on someone else just for their pleasure.
I am known as a respectful person and I'm always concerned about how other people feel. I need to talk to both of you...
I have changed alot in the past few years, I thought I would never stay out of trouble in school, and now most of my teachers look forward to me coming to class. But in the process I have lost several friends. I have decided to be successful in my life and get out of this little town called Texas City, Texas and be somebody. I would also like to spend more time with my dad, my favorite person in the world. There is no one else like him. My old man acts like he's 30 when he is 59 (yes I know, he is old). But in a few months he will be going away to work over-seas. He told me he'll be gone for the next few years. I hate that he'll be gone for so long. He is the only person I could really trust. I don't like talking to my mom cuz she has a problem with everything I do wrong. In the past few years she has only bought me things she wants me to have, even though my dad gives her alot of money from child support. My dad and I dont see what he did wrong, but he doesnt want me to mention it around her. Even though I dropped out of baseball, basketball, and piano, she doesnt want to waste her money thats she's supposed to spend on me. I've been asking her to sign me up for karate lessons but she keeps saying I'm gonna drop out of it like everything else, and she knows damn well that I sometimes get picked on. But thats ok, cuz I'm getting stronger and I spar with my friend who knows a fighting style every couple of weeks. My dad shows my some techniques every now-and-then that he learned while he was in Asia with the Reserves, or Army...whatever he was in. My 4 best friends are starting to slip away from me in their own directions. Its kinda strange how none of them get along with each other that much, I dont know how they survived my birthday party last year. Time as gone by fast in the past 2 years. My Monday through Friday has seemed like Monday, Wednesday, Friday. I remember when I was in elementry school I always wanted time to go by faster, its kind of ironic how that happend. Now everyday seems no different than the all the other days. Up until a few years ago I couldnt wait til my b-day, Christmas, spring break, for school to get out, And those days made my feel so happy and special. Now that feeling has gone. Almost everyday I wonder whats going to happen if I die, what will it really be like on the other side, will my death effect everyone else who know me...but the only thing that keeps me from being able to answer those questions is knowing that I won't come back...or so I assume. My dad helps me with my problems, and most of the time he gives me the correct answer. Once my father goes away I wont have anyway else to talk to and I'll be grown by the time he gets back, when his body is aching from working, when he can stay at home for the rest of his life and not have to worry about work, when he could look back on all the the struggles that he went through, and when its too late to stop my from making another mistake...
 Ryukinzo · Fri Feb 10, 2006 @ 10:31pm · 3 Comments |
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