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Rambling Flower a silly little journal when I got stuff on my mind. Vents, rants, drawings & doodles...odd little thoughts...maybe a few stories/fanfictions here and there. (btw...Fiori = Flower...ehhh? eh? Clever girl~ imsosorry)


Fiorizan
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in need of witchy guidance
07/22/15 2:04AM
I've also started getting into witchcraft and being more spiritual in general..it's been very interesting. I'm still clearly a novice witching but i'm trying here...I've discovered that i have a penchant for protection charms...at one point I'm going to start making little cloth bags with a protection sigil on one side and my personal symbol on the other.

speaking of personal sigils i didn't think i'd find mine so quickly? I'm not even 100% that it's my personal sign but so far my research on it has come up bubcus..

but it happened one night when i was meditating during a thunderstorm..for the longest time all i was seeing was that it seemed like i was looking straight down at water ripples like the rain hitting water then they would turn into daisies then they would start spinning around like a hurricane then disappear.

Then at one point there was a circle inside of a bigger circle (like a water ripple) and inside those circles was a diamond with an eye in the center of it all...and it wouldn't go away even when i was meditating again for the next few nights. it would just appear for a few minutes then go away..I have no idea what it meant and i wasn't getting any bad or terrifying feelings from it. I was more calm and curious about it. But my research and consulting with other witches didn't really work out..they all have no idea what it means/couldnt find anything on it..but maybe there is an answer to it?

my mom also believes that I could be an empath as well...Which I don't really see? I don't leave the house enough to really test out the theory..It's because she's an empath as well.. e <e;

While I was on vacation to my grandparents, my mom is a nut for ancestry (she's been working on a family tree for nearly four years) and she loves going to cemeteries where my great, great great (and so on) grandparents/relatives/cousins are buried (Which very sad to learn a majority of them were coal miners and died p young from mining accidents)

We went to a very old cemetery where my great great grandpa (Died in a coal mining accident at 33..) is buried and we couldn't actually find his grave for the longest time because his headstone fell over and the ground was growing over it/ old grass clippings were covering it (we actually walked past him when we first got there.)

interesting things had happened while there.

One. My mom actually called out to her guide to help her find the grave using the wind and the wind was actually directing her to where the grave was (my brother found him first but she was pretty close lol)

Two. I think there are some unhappy souls buried there...On my search i walked past a few graves that gave me a v unsettling feelings and the only thought that would come to my head was either "Leave me alone" or "Go away" 8l;; imgoinimgoin...

and Three the whole time I was there it felt like I was being drawn to the edge of the cemetery where unbaptized infants were buried along the edge of the cemetery, nearly in trees/forrest and it just confused me more than anything..i wasn't getting anything from the graves..? but I just kept getting a feeling I was suppose to go further into the woods (which..srry whatever's trying to reach me..i ain't goin in there..i'm not prepared for what i could find... q <q;; ) and another thought that said "There's more" which, granted the cemetery use to be farmland waaaaaay back in the day. It could have been a family plot from when it use to be a farm..
but at one point i was just like. look, idk what I'm suppose to be doing. All I know is that I'm nooot going into those dark woods.. and i turned around to leave. But as I was leaving the word "No" just kept repeating in my head and I kept getting a feeling to turn around but at that point i had to resist.. cause dang as soon as i got in the car i felt so drained and cranky I nearly konked out in the car on the way back. I had my crystals on me (A necklace of Rose Quartz and my grandmother's ring of Amethyst) and I felt so grateful to have them on me at the time..who knows what could have happened if I didn't have them idk (I felt like they provided enough energy for me to get back to the car at least)

MY PROBLEM HERE IS that I've never (knowingly??) been in contact with spirits(??) before so I'm not entirely sure with what I experienced at that cemetery that day??

V spoopy.. 0 <0

Another problem I have is my meditation..I know before I preform witchcraft I'm suppose to ground myself and all that...but i'm not entirely sure how..? It's really hard for me to get my head quiet and I'm just not even sure what i'm suppose to be feeling? I don't even know if I'm charging my crystals right cause of it..
and even when i'm meditating i can barely see anything? it's all pitch black with white outlines. It's like I'm looking at a blurry inverted sketch...(except for that symbol i described earlier..that one was clear as day)
even when i was trying to find my spiritual animal/guide i couldn't see him clearly but i got dark bits and pieces...in my first session I saw a quadrapetal animal..only from the torso down though - and it had the legs of an animal with hooves so like cows, horses, deer, ect. Then the next day I saw (Or I think I did) the head and it was the head of a Buck with laaaarge antlers like.. King Deer Here He Comes. But for a while now I haven't seen hide (hehe) nor hair of him...I know you won't see them every time but still..

I'd like to have clarity in my meditation if that's even possible?
the only time I had a bit more clarity was after I visted a flood memorial/museum and later that night while meditating i had very brief visions of the day replaying and then i even saw a victorian styled house i've never seen before?? (then again where i was there are victorian houses in abundance still so maybe i saw it in passing and just didn't remember seeing it? who knows)

So yea...I'm still obviously a novice witch but hopefully more experienced witches can help clarify my experiences and maybe help me gain more experience??


07/22/15 3:09AM




 
 
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