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********. You all. stressed I'm getting really tired of everyone hitting me with low blows when I'm trying to express concern over them and make sure that they stay safe. Does anyone seem to appreciate it? Maybe two people and their name are Dejah and Rynne. The rest of you don't have a damned clue what kind of crap I break my neck for you for if I know you in reality or how much I try to keep you safe and how much I care for and worry about you all the time if I know you online. And, quite frankly, I'm getting -tired- of that.
A little bit of respect, and appreciation when I try to help you out, would be very nice every now and then. Even when I'm helping out, do I hear a "Thank you" or "I appreciate this?" Nope, not from anyone but the two girls I named above. Nobody else does it. -Nobody.- And that's. Just. -********.- Sad, guys and girls. There's no other way to phrase it besides that one.
If you all think jail would be a better place than out here with the person who worries and cries about you all the time (The Evil One), or if you think someone taking advantage of you when you're drunk would care more about you than the person who gives you help and comfort, advice and friendship (Daughter), then by all means continue believing what you wish. Jesus Christ...No wonder I need ******** theropy and medicine for depression.
I'd like to really know how the -********- I let everyone turn me into this messed up a person. And no, Ash, don't try and say there's nothing wrong because almost every time I talk about it you dismiss the problems even though I'll readily and willingly listen to yours and try to help you with them. Nobody knows -everything- and I think an expert knows better about mental problems than somebody who says they have them despite that they probably might.
And another thing! I went for a walk to the park today to get over feeling like I was going to cry and ended up feeling worse on the way home than I did on the way there, which is the complete opposite of how things usually work. On the way home, however, I decided to try and seek Heavenly guidance from God in hopes He exists and cares about human affairs and stopped by three different churches. You know what? None of them were open. I thought churches were sanctuaries for the needy and places for them to go when they have nowhere else to turn to, but, I guess nobody told God that His housekeepers are -lazy.- When you need a church there's never one open to take care of you which is just one more reason I don't like going.

*sighs deeply to try and calm down slightly*...In other news, I have a job interview later today and I hope to get the position. Better still I hope I get used to the position when/if I receive it and that it doesn't interfer with my college studies too badly.
And ontop of that I also hope college goes well and that I don't have to change my course of study or drop out for some random reason.

I'm just so confused right now it's pathetic. I even have a couple of questions on my love life (do I even still -have- one?) that I'm not certain how to answer. I wrote a story on that earlier and I might post it on FictionPress.Com later but I'm not sure. It was just made to try and calm myself down a bit...
And I'm getting a little annoyed at the argument going on in my head right now between three of my voices...How do you make three people shut up when they're all different personas of you?



Gods damned I'm pathetic. And ******** hell, people, I'm about this close to not giving a damn what happens to -any- of you except two, -MAYBE- three, people. Whatever, I'm out. It's your lives and your bodies. Do with them what you want but just remember: If you go to jail, or if you get yourself in serious s**t trouble, I'll be here to talk when you get the chance to make you feel better. I won't even say "I told you so"...Until later.