• I bury my head into the pillow. I want to suffocate and die. I want to see who cries, who comes to my funeral; I want to know who cares. I breathe in, then out. In, out. In. I keep breathing faster and faster, and I can't control it anymore. I feel high, like I'm floating, but I know I'm not. I bury my face further into the pillow. I'd rather feel the pain then nothing at all. I grip the pillow and roll over. I'm staring at the ceiling, while gripping the pillow to my chest for dear life. I wonder if he's thinking about me, or her. who will he dream about tonight? Nothing. I feel nothing but my chest rising and falling slowly, and it calmed me. I wonder if it'll stop beating tonight, my heart I mean. I hope it will. He's slowly killing me. This death would be better, I think. "Kill me..." I whisper to myself. "I'd rather feel pain then nothing at all," I tell no one. My breathing slows and there's this sharp pain in my chest. I gasp for breath, but it seems like there's no oxygen left. "I promised you I'd be gone some day," I whisper to my pillow and hope some how you hear me, "I'm dying now." and now there's nothing again...