• Rodney and Monty.

    A not so normal girl sits on a very normal red leather sofa. This not so very normal girl looks normal enough with black boyish short hair style dangles annoyingly close to her bright green eyes. She pulls her overlarge black woolly jumper down over her knees and brushes some dog hairs off her black jeans.
    The dog in question is an over soppy border collie with short black and white hair that shines in the artificial light. The dog who's hair deposits itself everywhere is perched on a large footstool is barking at 2 squirrels running along the wall.
    The not so normal girl or Laura as her family, friends and pets call her smiles as the voices start.
    The first squirrel stops and glances back for a second before leaping off the wall his slightly larger frame causes him to land less softly than he desires. His pursuer stands on his hind legs his tail twitching shrieking at the pudgier rodent " Monty you absolute git! where the hell are my nuts?" Monty looks round " honestly Rodney I don't know did you ask that fat squirrel who lives in the second elm in? Hes defiantly got some seriously large nuts stashed away." Rodney who is slimmer than Monty dashes down the wall and leaps at Monty who is winded as the torpedo like squirrel finds his mark and a slapping contest the kind you get at a sale between two women fighting over a designer handbag ensues.
    The two squirrels are slapping each other silly as Monty hits out with a right straight into Rodney's lower jaw, Rodney stumbles back slightly using his tail to stop from falling over steadies himself before slapping Monty with both paws both sides of his face Monty stumbles backwards tripping over his tail causing him to land on his back. Rodney stands over Monty his paws held out screaming " so help me Monty you don't tell me where my nuts are I am going to strangle you!" Monty replies in kind by showing Rodney exactly where his nuts are dealing him a blow right beneath the belt ( if squirrels wore belts).
    Rodney stumbles as Monty rushes out of the not so normal girls garden and up the nearest tree out of harms way before feeling brave enough to stop and yell at Rodney " hows that for showing you where your nuts are!" Rodney lets out a low moan before sending out a torrent of swear words to which Monty replies by waving his furry booty and diving into the next tree making a run for it.
    Rodney seeing his quarry getting away runs up the tree Monty was in and chases after the nut thief they jump from tree to tree before going out of sight of the not so normal girl who's grandparents stare at her puzzled, wondering why she finds a pair of squirrels so amusing but then they don't listen the way she does. Smiling she goes back to playing on the Internet.