An Awakening of Life

• Artist: King Roxas Mouse-
• Description: I've been working on this for about 3 years so please be honest. This story takes place in the year 2042 on a forbidden area to the Crimsons (Rebulicans), but the home to the GrassMen (Rebels). My Story Begins here in the Crimson base. (just a little taste of the story) :mrgreen:
• Date: 07/18/2008
• Tags: kindallikehave

My name is "Ace" Torn. I began as a recruit to the Crimson army but I am a sargent in field operations. This mission is to find one of the most evilest of all GrassMen... "Skinmen." This man ate people for a living and now he must be stoped. Lilttle did i know I will have to make the biggest decison of my entire life....
Time: 19:25
Date:2042

"Alright commandos when we find this skin dude don't kill him take him as a prisoner knock him out or something, but DO NOT KILL HIM. Got it?" Comander says. We all say "Yes Sir." We said like a well oiled machine. The comander also told use to use your necter as least as possiable. Necter is an energy source that helps us become stronger, faster, and much more resistant to pain. The comander says I'm diffrent then all of the soliders. He says that diffrence can get me into trouble. With the wrong people. We have finally arrivied. The mission of my life has now began....
The rest my story will not be avalible for sometime so peace out and comment me

Comments

[Machiavellian_Prince]

I agree with skywolf down there. It's has a lot of potential, but it needs just a bit more depth. Also, most other people probably don't care, but it has a few grammar and spelling mistakes. You should probably try and fix those.

[skywerwolf]

its ok. you need more depth. other than that its prety good.

[King Roxas Mouse-]

Awesome story comment ppl